Drunken Truth
Looking back, it was all you. You were the one to decide what we should get off the menu. You were the one to put your head on my thigh. You were the one to kiss my hand. You initiated it all.
So what happened?
Why am I hearing you ask others whether or not I thought it was a date, saying you didn’t think it was when you were the one to take it a step further?
I just wanted to get to know you.
And why did you pretend to be concerned and ask what happened when you saw that I got hurt after weeks of no contact, only to never further the conversation?
Are you trying to hurt me more than you already have?
What are you trying to do? Why are you still presenting yourself to me? What do you want from me? Why are you confusing me?
Am I the fool?
Leave me alone.
Please.
Why don’t I want you to leave me alone.
Maybe
Well
you see
in my mind
I guess it goes a little something
like this.
I just love
wholeheartedly
fully
and I may doubt myself
but I never doubt you.
I’ll always forgive you
I’ll be the one to give in
because I love you
because
it’s you.
But I can’t keep doing this
as hypocritical as I might be
if you keep showing me
you don’t care
and that I’m not worth the risk.
Because I can keep giving
and I can keep hurting
but at some point
I think I might lose myself
and it was hard to realize that.
I can put you first
I always do
but
I don’t ask for much
really.
All I ask
is for your genuity
tell me I’m important to you
show me I’m worth it
love me like no one else.
Hm
maybe that is a lot
maybe I expected too much
in that case
I’m sorry.
I guess I’ve wasted
both your time and mine.
I loved you
maybe you loved me
but I’ll never know.