LIFE

Life is such a hard thing

Once you hit teen years everything gets fucked up

You start feeling things you didn't feel when you were 5.

Love.

What really is love?

No one knows. You can ask 100 people and they'll all have different things to say.

You meet someone that indulges you

And from there , shit, you start to feel something that you never felt.

You talk to them everyday

Learn something new about them everyday

End up seeing them when ever you have the chance to.

You guys go out after dark

That's when you know it's a different feeling.

You never felt this way for someone

Ever.

You notice the little things about her.

How beautiful the color of her eyes are

How she has that one tooth that isn't straight but it's okay because that's what makes her well you know .. her

You notice how big and juicy her lips are

How smooth her skin is

Fuck.

That's when you're fucked.

That's when you realize you're starting to fall in love with her.

But is she in love with you?

You don't know because she's still acting like she's just a friend.

Not knowing when someone loves you back makes you feel crazy...

But knowing that they don't love you

That they don't feel anything towards you like you feel for them

That's what hurts the most

Because you put all you have into this one person

You start to care about how they are and what they're doing

They tell you how fucked up their lives are and you stay there and sit talk to them and tell them it's okay.

Tell them you're there for them and you won't let them get hurt again.

But over time you ask yourself why am I even doing this for someone that doesn't love me back

Then you start to wonder if they would do all of this for you and you realize ...

No they won't.

Your insecurities come back

You want to hide

You don't feel like going out as much anymore

You stop eating as much as you did

You start to change

You cut your hair

You stop putting on make up

You start dressing like you don't care

Her

She's noticed

She noticed you changed

And she doesn't understand why

And you have to tell her why because she's sitting right infront of you and you have no where to go

To hide

You tell her you love her

She looks deep into your dark eyes

And she smiles

She says

"I love you too"

That's when you want to hide baby girl.

Because when someone tells you they love you

That means they're going to hurt you

Endlessly

Over

And

Over

Until you start feeling like it's how you should be treated.

No

Never

You deserve better

AJ