De-extinction

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the 35th week of Major Inventions Around the Galaxy! This week, we discover how to revive creatures of the past. And now, we bring you all the way to the lab of Dr Erutuf on Planet Earth, where our Earth correspondent will take over. Mishu, please."

"Thank you, Pollan. Here on Planet Earth, it is blisteringly hot and it is desert all around us for miles. Fortunately we are in Dr Erutuf's lab, which is cooled with liquid nitrogen. Before we begin, a little background about Dr Erutuf: Dr Erutuf completed his PhD in 2499, where he researched on genetic engineering and developed an interest in prehistoric life. He was conferred the prestigious Chancellor's Award this year for his work on reverse genetic engineering. Now, Dr Erutuf, I am sure we are all raring to hear about your discovery."

"Before I begin, thank you for inviting me to be on your talk show. It is a real pleasure indeed. Well, I have always been interested in fossils and DNA. And one day I watched this really outdated show -- something I found in the scrapyard over there -- and I thought, wow, if you could recreate dinosaurs out of DNA preserved in mosquitoes which sucked their blood, how great would that be? It's like discovering a new life form. We're bringing back the creatures which lived in times way before ours, beasts which have gone extinct, and we're seeing them for the first time in our history. So I paid abandoned laboratories around this world a visit, scouring for fossils and specimens which might just have a scrap of DNA that I could use to bring the organism back to life."

"That sounds tedious."

"Certainly it was! But the rewards have been great."

"Indeed they have. Dr Erutuf, could you show us your specimens?"

"Sure. They are grouped based on the Inter-Galaxy Classification of Organisms. Level One's the meek and docile animals, like gazeers and hamits. You might want to direct the camera there - ah, yes, there. That first cage over there contains a dodo, or Raphus cucullatus. It went extinct in 1693. We can't be exactly sure, of course, but this is most likely the case based on historical records."

"That's more than a thousand years ago. How did you manage to recreate it, Dr Erutuf?"

"Ah, a combination of 3D printing and genetic engineering brought the bird back to life. It isn't exactly the same as the original -- contains a little DNA from the pigoves -- but it's about the closest we can get."

"You recreated the dodos in large quantities, Dr Erutuf?"

"Yes, I made about fifty thousand of them, to be sold across all pet stores starting tomorrow. They're fairly easy to handle, and they're rather amiable and meek, if a little shatterbrained."

"As the common phrase goes, dumb as a dodo. Okay, now that we've seen the dodo, what other creatures do we have? What about that one there in the large cage, the one baring its teeth at me?"

"Oh, don't mind Dugal. That's a Bengal tiger, or Panthera tigris tigris, for those who prefer to be more precise. He's a Level Two organism. Level Two organisms may attack us on provocation, but they're generally quite harmless if you leave them alone."

"He doesn't look very harmless to me. Look at his teeth!"

"He's a carnivore; of course his teeth are sharp and pointy. But he's a real beauty. Shame that his kind went extinct in 2030. I found his fossils in a desert."

"Whatever you say, Dr Erutuf. I don't suppose he can be a pet."

"No, but perhaps we will introduce them to parks and gardens."

"Well, remind me not to go too near it if ever I come across one. What's Level Three, Dr Erutuf?"

"Level Three organisms are those which have the ability to cause major disruptions if let loose. They can be quite dangerous to us, which is why they should be kept locked up at all times. I've recreated the smaller kinds of these creatures. The Velociraptor here, for example. It's the size of a chicken, but still rather lethal if it's allowed to roam around freely. Now, as for the Tyrannosaurus rex, I haven't quite figured out how to contain that yet so I haven't recreated it."

"If they're going to be caged up, what's the point of recreating them?"

"Well, that's classified, so I can't tell you. Shall we move on to Level Four?"

"Yes, please. I cannot imagine what Level Four creatures will be like if those reptilians are only Level Three. I'm sure the viewers agree."

"Level Four creatures are those which wreak havoc on every bit of land they converge upon. They can destroy planets and perhaps even galaxies."

"They sound positively lethal. Is it that, Dr Erutuf?"

"No, that's a Brachiosaurus -- a Level Three organism. And it's really quite harmless."

"Oh, sorry. It looked very large."

"Size doesn't always matter. I haven't recreated Level Four creatures because they are really too dangerous. And actually, there is only one type of Level Four creature, in that cylinder over there."

"It doesn't look very intimidating at all!"

"As I said, size doesn't always matter. I have conclusive evidence that these creatures destroyed not only their home planet and nearly every other living thing on it, but also territory outside their home turf."

"Good heavens! Spare us the suspense and tell us what this frightful creature is, Dr Erutuf!'

"Humans. Homo sapiens."