I am not a noun. I am a verb.

What do you do?

What do you mean? I do a lot of things.

Yeah but when you introduce yourself to someone you say, “Hi, I…”

“Hi, I like to write.”

Oh cool you’re a writer?

Sometimes.

Well what about the rest of the time?

I dunno, I like to read a lot too.

Ok but what’s your job?

Like, what do I do for money? Is that what you mean?

Yeah.

Oh well I tutor.

So you’re a tutor?

Sometimes.

What do you mean sometimes? You’re either a tutor or you’re not.

Well sometimes I tutor. Most of the time I don’t.

Yeah but if that’s your job then you’re a tutor.

No.

What do you mean, no?

I mean I’m not a tutor. I’m not a noun. I’m a verb. I tutor.

I don’t get it.

Ok let me ask you this; what do you do for money?

I’m a bank teller.

You’re a bank teller.

Yes.

You’re a noun?

Huh?

You tell banks?

You’re confusing me.

Are you trying to tell me that the sum of everything you are can be explained as “I’m a bank teller?”

No, obviously not.

Obviously.

I do other things than work at a bank.

Then why are you trying to define yourself by your job?

That’s not what I was doing at all.

Of course it was. You said “Hi, I’m a bank teller.”

…

Do you see what I mean? You’re more than the sum of the roles you occupy. Why would you want to limit yourself?

I’m not limiting myself by telling people what I do for a living.

For a living?

Yeah?

You live for work?

What? No!

Then why did you say you’re doing it for a living?

It’s a turn of phrase, it doesn’t mean anything.

Of course it does. Everything means something. You said it, you expected me to understand what you meant when you said it, of course it has meaning.

Yeah but it doesn’t mean that.

What does it mean then?

It means I do it to make money so I can afford to live! There! Does that make sense to you?

I mean, I understand it, but that doesn’t mean it makes sense to me.

Ugh. You’re so frustrating. Why are you like this?

Like what?

THIS! Why are you questioning everything I say? Why can’t you just make conversation like a normal person? You obviously know what I mean when I’m asking these things. Why are you pretending to be so obtuse?

You think I’m being obtuse?

Uh, yeah. Yeah I do. I think you’re deliberately trying to be annoying.

I’m sorry you feel that way. That’s not my intention.

Then what is your intention?

To make you think?

You’re saying I don’t think?

No, I’m saying you don’t think about the things you find so common to ask about because you’ve never had a reason to question it.

Questions like these are common for a reason when you’re meeting someone new.

Why?

What do you mean why? I’m trying to get to know you!

No, you’re trying to learn the labels I’ve been given. I am not a noun. I am a verb. I am not stagnation or complacency or anything you can easily define. I am motion. I reject the idea that you can take something I do occasionally and make that my identity. I am more than the sum of the things that I happen to be doing. I am more than the sum of the roles I am told to play. I am more than the sum of the labels people use to define the world around them because they’re afraid of ambiguity. I am indescribable. I am uncomfortable. I am everything and nothing and all of the things in between. But I am not a noun.

You’re weird is what you are.

I know.

You’re definitely right about you being uncomfortable. Thanks for the drink, but I’m gonna take off now.

No worries. And you’re welcome.

Bye!

Bye bank teller!

…

…

*sigh*