Badass Rapunzel

Living in the tower

Rapunzel and Gothel

Made a perfect pair

Of mother and daughter.

To satisfy their unfulfilled pleasures,

Together the evil pair

Would lure men

Using Rapunzel's wig of golden hair

The wig, made of tough synthetic hair,

Had been ordered online

Quite pleased with its length,

It suited Rapunzel just fine.

Of a damsel in distress

The role she would play,

While her mom tricked handsome young men

Into being her prey.

The code phrase

"Rapunzel, Rapunzel let down your hair"

A cascade of tumbling locks out of the window

Would cause the guys to stare.

Little did they know

They were walking to their doom

Cause once inside, they would be trapped

Into one of the tower's windowless room.

Both mother and daughter

Would fulfil their pleasure

When the hormones demanded

Or at their own leisure.

...

One fine guy, of noble descent

Caught Rapunzel's liking

His manners, she thought

To be very striking.

Locked away with him for hours

She was too busy, applying her seductive charm

That she didn't realize

She had forgotten to set her ovulation alarm.

Not surprisingly, he got her pregnant

Much to her dismay

She knew he had broken the rules

And now wouldn't be allowed to stay.

As furious as she could be

Upon hearing the news, Dame Gothel

Commanded her daughter

To prepare for the slaughter.

To the young man's surprise

He was attacked by the two

To tie him up. But for what?

He had no clue.

Gothel grinned,

A game played fair

As they choked him with

Rapunzel's wig of golden hair.

Alas he never got to know

Why his body was distorted

Nor did he live to see,

His unborn child aborted.