today, I write for the sunflowers.

last night, the first man I ever loved tried to kill himself. he didn't jump, but he holds the clouds in his hand every day and I can't help but feel like they hang a little lower today. when I approached him today, he was sweating and jittery and his eyes seemed to be lower on his face. everything was lower today, especially everyone's mood. he's in the hospital as I write this, and I am expected to go about my day as normal. i'm scared for his wellbeing at the moment, because as close as we are, i didn't know that he'd succumbed this far into negativity. i'm walking without him right now, without those hazel eyes, and that smile that puts the sun to shame. 

if anyone cares, I will keep them updated on him. 

x 

poppy.