Worthless

I've seen my blood run out

Strange, it doesn't hurt

Stranger yet, it relieves the pain

Even stranger, I don't want it to stop.

I've seen my tears run red as blood

Strange it doesn't hurt

Stranger yet, it gives a painful release

Even stranger, I don't want them to stop.

Death seems a respite from the pain

The pain of always falling short

Death seems a relief from being an outsider

An outsider in your own home

Death seems to be your friend

Your closest friend.

Remember your terrible grief...

Do that to someone else...never

How to move forward, to feel well

What do I do?

Still, I see the red lines running down my arms

Still, I want to quit life

Still, I feel useless

Still, I feel HATE

Hate drives me to ruin

Hate is wrong...

Hate is bitterness

Hate is slowly killing me

What is the object of my hate?

Me

My shortcomings

My thoughts

My body

Why do I hate?

Because I suck!

Because I'm never good enough

Because I never do things quite right

Because I can't be everything to everybody

My efforts are never enough

I'll never be good enough

I'll never love enough

I am worthless