Fade

"Keith? Do you wanna go and play make-believe?" Ryan beams. I smile at him. "Sure! What do you want to pretend to be?"

Ryan thinks for a while. "I don't know. How about pirates?" I grin. "Great idea!"

We horse around and play, having fun. Ryan cackles with joy and delight.

Ryan's mother pokes her head into the room. "Ry-ry, who are you talking to?" she frowns. 

"Mommy, it's just Keithy," Ryan points at me, beaming. "We're playing pirates."

His mom looks over in my direction, and her face twists with confusion. Then slowly, a smile spreads over her face. "Oh... You mean Keithy, eh? Okay, have fun, Ryan! Uh... and Keithy!"

She leaves and leaves us to our playing.

*

"I want a dog!" screams Ryan. "A dog!" Tears are streaming down his face. He's refusing to talk to his parents until they get him a dog. 

I hug him. "Shh, Ryan. Your parents can be pretty mean sometimes, right?"

"Yeah!" Ryan sniffs indignantly. "I WANT A DOG!"

"Me too," I sulk. "How about we just sit here and scream that we want a dog together. Maybe it'll make you feel better and your parents will listen."

And we do. The neighbours come and complain some time later, but well, we both feel slightly better, at least.

*

"Ryan! What are you doing with cereal all over your head?!" his mom scolds. Ryan sulks, pointing at me. "It's all Keith's fault! He didn't want to eat his cereal and dumped it all over my head!" 

His mom frowns. "Not funny, Ryan. Stop playing with your food!" 

Ryan crosses his arms and pouts at me. I grin at him, laughter twisting my features.

*

Ryan's six now. "Hey, Ryan," I smile. "Wanna play make-believe?" 

Ryan glances at me, shakes his head. "Nah, I'm gonna play with my friends."

My smile slowly dies, but I quickly plaster a weak one on my face. "Oh! Oh... Sure...! Have fun!"

Ryan leaves the house and greets his friends who are standing outside, waiting for him with large grins on their faces. Ryan smiles elatedly at them, and I feel a twinge of pain stabbing through my heart. Ryan hasn't smiled at me like that for a while. Sighing, I walk back to his room, waiting for him to come back.

*

"Ryan? Are you feeling okay? What's the matter?" I ask eight-year-old Ryan. 

Ryan rolls his eyes at me. "It's nothing," he dismisses it, but there's clearly something wrong.

"Hey, you can tell me. I'm your best friend," I remind him, placing a hand on his shoulder. 

Ryan shoots me a glare, one that chills me to the bone. I withdraw my hand and stumble back, eyes wide in shock. This is the first time I feel such resentment towards me from him. Did I do something wrong?

"You're not my best friend, Keith," he says, before whipping out a phone and talking to another of his friends. My heart throbs, and I feel tears welling up in my eyes.  I stumble out of the room. I look at my hands.They're glowing, becoming slightly translucent. I hiss in pain. 

I'm fading.

*

Ryan's nine. I've been struggling to rebuild our relationship, but he's very distant now. He mostly just ignores me, cares only about his other friends. Everyday, I can tell that I'm becoming more and more translucent. I'm a pale translucent silver now, plagued by constant headaches and stabbing pains through my heart.

"R-Ryan...?" I manage weakly. "Do you... Do you want to play make-believe?"

Ryan just glares at me. "Leave me alone, Keith. I have homework to do, then I'm going out to play with my friends."

Another jolt of excruciating pain slashes through me. I clutch at my head, crumpling to my knees, black spots dancing before my eyes, my vision blurry and head dizzy. I grab onto the edge of Ryan's bed for support, panting, tears stinging at my eyes. My hands, my body. Barely visible now. Almost completely see-through.

I let out a sob. Ryan ignores me.

*

And now he's ten. 

"Ryan...!" I stumble over to him. "L-let's p-p-play!"

He continues his work like I am not there. 

"Ryan!" I try calling him again. It's like he doesn't hear me. I wave my hand in front of his face. He doesn't respond.

I place it on his shoulder, but my hand goes right through him. I swallow, trying again and again. I've become intangible. 

"Ryan!" I cry out again. "Ryan!" Once again he doesn't respond. "Please..." I'm begging, sinking to my knees. My hands. They're becoming transparent. And now, I can't even see them anymore. My body shakes with pain. "Ryan... Help... Don't let me fade..." I choke out a cry.

Ryan doesn't react. He continues doing his homework. 

Tears cascade down my cheeks. I cry, cry, tears inundating my heart, hopelessness and agony coursing throughout my being. My senses aren't working anymore. I can't feel my body. Everything is numb, dark, and silent. All I am aware of now is the excruciating pain and sorrow that rips through my heart.

"R-ryan..." I whisper, using my last ounce of strength to reach up towards him, to outstretch an arm, waiting for him to smile, reach down and help me up, like I always did for him.

Nothing. I no longer exist to him, not even in his memories.

Ryan, my Ryan, has grown up.

A broken, melancholic smile contorts my features.

And then I fade away completely.

Goodbye.