Dear Dignity, here’s the thing...

Dear Dignity,

I'm sorry I've abandoned you for so many years. Forgive me for not being able to manage your presence. I feel like you require so much attention and I have so little to give. I truly believe, from the bottom of my heart, that you would be happier in someone else's conscience. 

Don't take it personally. It's just that theres no space for you anymore. If anything, you can blame Mr. Foolishness and Mrs. Stupidity, their existence is simply incompatible to yours and quite frankly they're renting out more and more brain space over the years. 

You know how you get with them when things get out of hand. You try shoving them in a corner, out of sight, or writing them off under false labeling; Brother Acting and Sister Exhaustion are sick of of being slandered by you, and Mama Embarrassment just loses it whenever the slightest problem arises. 

I wish I had the B₡ (brain cells) to pay for your own mini lodging, but I'm sorry, I just can't afford it anymore, especially not with yet another Baby Exisistential Crisis on the way.