Journaling

You say you like me now

I will just drag you down 

I'm good at making people feel wanted

I'm good at loving, I'm good at being desirable

But once you see the demons I carry

You'll run

Because that's what people do

When they don't know the pain you suffered that made you, you

And I seem like fun, and I can be

But other days I fall apart 

And I can't show that side of me

Because they all use it against you at one point or another 

So they can never know

What you hold deep

And human connection is something I need

But I can only let someone know me so far

Before I pull away and keep them at arms length 

What a mess I am 

I know how it happened 

But how do I fix it?