lay something heavy on me

the air is thinning with elevation

sing that condescending song, I’ve never known expectations

high torched words in return, stepping out of line gets me burned

looking me up with heart piercing eyes, they sense I’m forgetting a self left behind

still working on how to plea, explain, maybe they’ll get it later but today,

I work with a mask glued from a misread past

opposing reputation conceals myself but never desire

it’s all I’m standing on they throw as a reminder

yet they can’t deny - I’m on fucking fire

lay something heavy on me

for it’d be a lie to say I don’t take the words to where I lay

just for weigh, not use to no pain leaves me searching for more

till morning comes then I’m pinned to the floor

light and enlightened faith is setting in and now I don’t know where to begin, so please

lay something heavy on me

but nothing of soul or body

probing questions like it’s a mystery

I’m fine, bottom line, I lack lust for another

some think it’s hot, mind driving frustration

just tell yourself whatever makes you feel better,

I don’t run away from being afraid

bored before you save my number, I’m not stuck up or laying with another

I see much, the flash in your eye before you ever think to say hi

that’s a weak power I don’t want to hold, it’s lovely, please trust me, keep the strings to your soul, but despise me if you must take my passing on them, as something from an unaccepting stem

absent of rules to a win or lose game,

now you’re the one running away

I squint at the start line to your fictitious race

lay something heavy on me

I’m bored with peace maybe I should play, just a night

sometimes I despise my inability to tell a lie

thoughts drop before my hand is in motion

creations proposed in mind never measure

I’m no stranger to what they say brings pleasure, I like my highs to last forever, and I’ve heard of one too good to be true!

my family thinks I’m smug but I’m an addict too

that’s why I’m walking this line, don’t get confused, you'd be a fool to come in-between ones needed muse

question my stepping it’s never blind

I’m one who’s too obsessed with the why

lay something heavy on me

working through withheld promises

my stubbornness has even left me astonished, won’t back down, don’t expect me to leave

now I see you holding your breath before I speak

there’s something to be said and you know,

it’s not just me

emotional toying, seen from a mile

you’re lucky I can fake a good smile

gossip leaves a bad taste

you’re lucky southern queens weigh in on your fate

still saving your face with made up grace, if I really listened I’d be out of this place, but my word is my word though stained in disgrace

bitter from the long lag to believe, I give halos to those with pieces of me

lay something heavy on me

pull it from my mouth these words are heavy

I walk in the room as natural positions try to resume

loaded with tension they scream to escape, I feel shifting egos for fear of blame

why must our highest power be the one we hate

head in the sand, avoiding debates I can’t stand, I’ve never know medium so try to understand

in reflective hindsight, I should have seen it coming, God must be ironically funny

lay something heavy on me

this one I need and can’t escape, been avoiding it for too long, now I see how it’s fate

shouldn’t have said think what you will

looked into others to see what was real

made habit of hard hills for obsessive thrills

my least care and biggest flare, just when you think you’re done, another one to overcome