The Family Breakup

That morning I knew it was over,

I was young, I didn't understand but, now I am older,

The crazy stupid notion of love grew colder

On the day I found out my dad was never a soldier.

He didn't march on or even retreat,

He sat in the middle of a battlefield and admitted his defeat,

That battle field was called depression and it killed him it did,

He did something so terrible even God forbid.

The deep scars you gave remain,

Deeper than the ones I gave myself with feelings I couldn’t contain,

These crazy ideas used to bounce around in my brain,

All because you never gave yourself time to explain.

Time to explain why felt that way,

Time to explain why you couldn’t stay,

Time to explain the reason to why

You thought the easy way was to die.

I am sorry, I truly am,

Sorry I thought better of you as a man,

Sorry your love didn’t stretch so far,

And sorry you destroyed all that you are.

Now this is me saying, it wasn’t me it was you,

You who tore apart everything I knew,

You who set a bad example which I so nearly followed

You who made my heart feel icy and hollowed.

You took your life and part of mine,

The part where I have a father who doesn’t resign,

The part where my dad watches me climb,

The one where everything turns out just fine.

This was a break up between you and me,

A break up you cast upon the whole family,

We haven’t recovered don’t be fooled,

The mask I have created may look like a jewel.

So, what I am saying in this rhyme of mine

Is that you gave us battle wounds that won’t heal in time,

Instead they will shrink and become less sore

I won’t let mine swallow me anymore.