Band´s Best...Berformance

Best bands burrow bravely beyond borders, but Bastard Barbarians booked bars, bistros, begrimed beer-bashes.

Dave´s dim-witted doppelganger Dick, doubled Dave during difficult days. Dave´s drumming: drowsy, dismal, dreary. Dick´s: devastating.

Ricky´s riffing recently resembled rheumatism-ridden rambling. Rich rhythms required rocking ruthlessness, relentless ramming…Ricky´s resolution: Rum&Ritalin. Ricky´s resticles rashed.

The trousers, tucked tightly through tantalizing twines, tickled Ted´s tummy. Ted tried to taper, though this tested Trevor´s temper. Tense Trevor tried to threaten Ted to triple the tempo. This treatment ticked Ted, tender trombonist, to tempestuous tantrums. “Tucking tunt!” Ted tumulted. Trevor thundered: “Timing! Tighten the timing!”

Meanwhile, Manuel manifested marvelous musicianship, mastering many moving melodies, mainly making manic movements manipulating Mary´s mandolin. Mary monitored Manuel´s mannerisms. Magnificent, Mary mused.

Barney bounced bass beautifully, but bellowed: “Blimey, banging bongos brought better benefits. Barkeeper, bring beer!”

“Ready”, Ricky retorted.

“Truly”, told Ted.

“Dude, dodally” Dick declared.

“Mmm, magnifico”, Manuel mentioned.

“Beer, bring beer!” Barney beckoned.

This time, they totaled the tavern. Their timing titillated the tough troupe. Thespians, throat-surgeons, taxidermists, thankless tellers…they totally thrived through this. Tomorrow, they´d travel to Texas…