7 lessons I will teach my children:

1. Always get the milk out BEFORE you pour your cereal

2. When you feel the beat of your peoples drum in your chest, when your heart swells with the song of pride, you let your passion fill the souls of everyone around, let them know your strength, and make no apologies for knowing it too.

3. Love is patient. When your teeth grind together like stones, and your fists clench so tightly you’ve made an angry mold of your metacarpal bones, remember love is patient. Take a deep breath and taste the perfume of the person you love and give them time to remind you why you do.

4. What’s between your thighs has as little meaning as what’s between your eyes, the shell of a body you were born into does not define who you are or will be. Like a snail or hermit crab I encourage you to seek a home you can always carry and be comfortable in.

5. Men are gross, and women are too, people can suck, and so might you.

6. Everyone has felt pain, has felt joy, has felt inescapable sadness, has felt love beyond words. Everyone feels, everyone lives. It IS normal.

7. Febreze doesn’t work magic, just makes it smell like you shit fruit.