Off With the Head (a one-act play from the book “Dog Years Within the Curse of 7. Seven Plays”)
Dog Years Within the Curse of 7. Seven Plays
By
Xavier Cockroachal Damon
visit my website at: http://www.wastelandvoid.wix.com/xaviercockroachal
Off With the Head
Dung
Dung-ACT II
Suicide Fanatics
The Amnesiac
THE UNWELCOME VISITORS
Memories of Tomorrow
Just One of Those Days
Just One of Those Days-(Scenes 11-22)
Off With the Head
by Xavier Cockroachal Damon
Original performances were directed by Melissa Maney
Cast of Characters:
THE KING
THE ADVISOR
GUARDS 1-12
THE PROSTITUTE
THE JESTER
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT
THE ADVISOR 2
Setting: (The throne room of a castle. Distant past)
At Rise: (THE KING sits upon the throne, wearing a king’s robe and crown and has a somewhat agitated, restless look. THE ADVISOR enters.)
THE ADVISOR: My king, how might you be doing this day?
THE KING: I am doing as I am doing and will be doing how I am doing regardless of what I am doing for I can only be doing how I am doing when I am doing what it is that I am doing and that is exactly how I am doing. And I would caution you to, in the future, think long and hard about whether you truly do wish to ask me the question of how it is that I am doing when it is entirely possible that how I am doing is a state where I will not take kindly to being asked how I am doing.
THE ADVISOR: My king, please forgive me, I assure you I meant no harm or insolence whatsoever. You have my most sincere, heartfelt apology.
THE KING: Very well then, I accept your apology, just use it as a learning experience for the future.
THE ADVISOR: Absolutely my king. You can rest assured I have indeed learned my lesson as I will continue to dutifully and humbly serve the crown.
THE KING: Very well then. (pause) Guards, off with his head!
(GUARDS 1 AND 2 enter.)
THE ADVISOR: But my king, my king I told you, I have learned my lesson, believe me I have.
THE KING: Yeah, well you didn’t learn it fast enough. Guards take him away.
GUARDS 1 AND 2: Yes, my king
(GUARDS 1 AND 2 lead THE ADVISOR away)
THE KING: (THE KING just sits there, fidgety, looking around with a more agitated look.) I’m bored. Guards, come back in here.
(GUARDS 1 AND 2 enter)
GUARDS 1 AND 2: Yes my king.
THE KING: The two of you, I don’t know, get into a, get into a fight or something and one of you kill the other one or something.
GUARD 1: But King, that’s my son, he’s my little boy.
THE KING: Did I freakin ask for a genealogy history of the both of you? No, I asked you to duel to the death with your swords, and that is an order so the both of you follow it or I’ll have you both put to death. So hurry up, get on with it.
GUARD 2: But dad, I don’t want to.
GUARD 1: Son, we don’t have a choice. It be the king’s decree. So come on son, give it your best, and just remember everything I taught you about sword fighting.
GUARD 2: O.k. dad, if you say so. (A furious sword duel ensues. It ends when the son fatally fells his father with his sword. The father dropping to the ground, the son dropping to the ground and cradling him, holding his dying father in his arms.) No, dad!
GUARD 1: It’s o.k. son, you didn’t have a choice.
GUARD 2: But, but, please, you can’t die, I love you dad.
GUARD 1: It’s o.k. my son, I’m just glad it was me and not you. I had to go some time. It’s how it was meant to be.
GUARD 2: But this can’t be happening, I won’t let you die!
GUARD 1: Son, there’s nothing you can do. It’s how the Gods wanted it. It was meant to be. Son, just do me a favor, take care of your mother, will you. And remember, no regrets, you did it, for the crown.
(The father dies. The son starts weeping hysterically.)
GUARD 2: No, dad.
(The son cries even more uncontrollably.)
THE KING: Oh come on, other guards!
(GUARDS 3 AND 4 enter.)
GUARDS 3 AND 4: Yes my king.
THE KING: Will you please take the sniveling, whining little brat out of here and chop off his head.
GUARDS 3 AND 4: At once my king.
(GUARD 2 is led away, crying, by GUARD 3 while GUARD 4 collects the dead body of GUARD 1 and carries it off the stage.)
THE KING: Give me a break. What a whiny little bitch. (THE KING just sits there, even more fidgety.) Well that really failed miserably. It was totally uninspiring. So what the hell am I going to do today? (THE KING just sits there, appearing more agitated.) Oh God, this being a king thing really isn’t easy, having to care for your kingdom, always having to be right. But what am I going to do today? (THE KING even more fidgety and restless looking) Guards!
(GUARDS 3 AND 4 enter.)
GUARDS 3 AND 4: Yes my king.
THE KING: Take yourselves to the execution chamber and have your heads chopped off.
GUARD 3: But, my king, if I might ask, what is it that we did?
THE KING: I’m sure you’ll do something at some point today so just have it done pre-emptively.
GUARD 3: As you command my king, we shall venture to the execution chamber at once.
GUARD 4: (to GUARD 3) But I don’t want to have my head chopped off.
GUARD 3: There’s really nothing that can be done about it, why it was the king himself who decreed it. So no more protestations, as your commanding officer I assure you that if you continue to do so, I’ll have your head chopped off.
GUARD 4: Very well then. My apologies. For the king is only on the throne but by the grace of God, and therefore the king’s words are the words of the divine which only exist to serve the crown. I will die for the king if I must so that the kingdom might prosper. For the crown!
GUARD 3: Yes, indeed. So come on, let’s be loyal soldiers and go follow our orders as the king instructed us to do.
(GUARDS 3 AND 4 exit. THE KING sits there, looking further agitated)
THE KING: O.k., enough of this, I absolutely have to come up with something here. I really need to think of something to do. Hmm, you know, I guess I could just summon the services of a prostitute. Hell, why not, something to do. Guards! Um, guards other than the other guards, um, other than the other guards as well. Um, guards who are not yet dead, in here at once.
(GUARDS 5 AND 6 enter.)
GUARDS 5 AND 6: Yes my king?
THE KING: Guards, get a prostitute from the courtyard and send her in, I wish her services.
GUARDS 5 AND 6: At once my king
(GUARDS 5 AND 6 exit, after a short while THE PROSTITUTE enters.)
THE KING: Why hello. I found myself sitting around trying to think of something to do and so I decided to call on your services.
THE PROSTITUTE: (with a very seductive tone) Oh, I see then king, you wanted something to do and figured you’d do me did ya? Well then king, let me say this. (voice turns very angry) That’s not the way it works king!
THE KING: Um, ah, wait, you know, you are a prostitute, that’s sort of in every way the way it is supposed to work.
THE PROSTITUTE: Want me to work, sure, why not, why shouldn’t I do all the work. By all means. (extremely mocking voice) Ooh sure king, whatever you want king, of course my king, my king, I’ll just do whatever you want my king, ooh sure king, why not king, seems fair king doesn’t it king. You know what king, piss off.
THE KING: Um, ah, again, ah, you are a prostitute you do realize.
THE PROSTITUTE: Piss off you bastard, I’ve got better things to do then sleep with the likes of you.
THE KING: Um, ah, on that point. You know, looking back at all the other times I paid for your services, I’m realizing you never actually provided any. I mean all the times when you would actually join me in my chambers, we never actually had sex or anything, you would just sit there, fixing your hair, or clipping your toe nails.
THE PROSTITUTE: Like I said, I got better things to do then sleep with the likes of you!
THE KING: Um, but, again, you’re a prostitute.
THE PROSTITUTE: Damn right I am, and where’s my money?
THE KING: Um, right here. (THE KING hands her the money) Um, look, could I at least get something out of this transaction?
THE PROSTITUTE: You can look at my ass as I walk out of the room. (THE PROSTITUTE starts walking away, then turns around and comes back.) That’s it, I want a tip.
THE KING: Um, what if I just don’t actually look at your ass?
THE PROSTITUTE: Too late, you already did, now where’s my tip?
THE KING: Um, here you go. (THE KING gives her the money. She turns and starts walking out again.) Um, bye.
THE PROSTITUTE: Piss off!
(THE PROSTITUTE exits.)
THE KING: O.k., that really didn’t go as I had hoped it would. (agitated pause) Goddamn, I have to find something to do with this day or it will be the death of me. But what? But what? Come on, think of something. What though, what? (THE KING just sits there, thinking.) I have it, comedy, could certainly do with a laugh after that last exchange. Why don’t I summon the court Jester for entertainment. Yes, yes. Guards!
(GUARDS 5 AND 6 enter.)
GUARDS 5 AND 6: Yes my king, what is it that you wish?
THE KING: Summon the court jester immediately.
GUARDS 5 AND 6: Absolutely my king.
(GUARDS 5 AND 6 exit, THE KING sits there waiting, tapping his knee.)
THE KING: Now this should actually be fun.
(GUARDS 5 AND 6 enter with THE JESTER.)
GUARDS 5 AND 6: My king, we have arrived with the court jester as you commanded.
THE KING: Yeah, but you took like two minutes to do so when I explicitly informed you I wanted the court jester here immediately.
GUARD 5: Um, but, my king, he wasn’t actually here and we had to go and get him and that we did immediately.
THE KING: Like I give a damn. I said immediately and he was in no way delivered here immediately. That’s it, I’ve had enough with both of you, off with both your heads.
GUARDS 5 AND 6: Indeed my king. For the crown!
(GUARDS 5 AND 6 exit. THE KING sits on his throne as THE JESTER stands before him.)
THE KING: So, jester, what is it that you can do for me, to, you know, to make this day not an entirely wasted piece of crap? Can you make me laugh? Could use a laugh.
THE JESTER: Why the jester can do what the jester does which is what the jester always does, and what he does is make all he encounters laugh, as he fills them with joy and happiness that will put a smile upon their face.
THE KING: Yeah, well, you see, not really big on the whole joy and happiness, smiling thing, so anything else you can do? You know, something to make me laugh but without the whole, smiling, being happy stuff?
THE JESTER: Why my king, how in your kingdom could you not smile and be happy, for clowns fill the streets from end to end and live beneath the stage.
THE KING: Yeah, o.k., time out, little problem with your logic, for if the clowns are beneath the stage you could hardly contend they are living for they would then be obviously already dead. So kindly tell me how a bunch of dead clowns, rotting beneath my feet could possibly in any way help me at all?
THE JESTER: Why a rotting clown beneath the ground, so then grows from the soil the gift of laughter.
THE KING: So what are you saying, a bunch of dead clowns are going to sprout up flowers that are literally laughing? For Christ’s sake, if that happened, I’d have them burned. Is that your answer to the problem?
THE JESTER: Fortune is a fleeting flower, always Jester’s final hour, death played out up on the stage, entertainment be thy name.
THE KING: Well, you know what, it is going to be Jester’s final hour if you don’t actually do something to entertain me and make me laugh you douche.
THE JESTER: How about I do a comical dance?
THE KING: Fine, whatever.
(THE JESTER starts dancing.)
THE KING: Are you kidding me? Do you honestly think that crap could even entertain a mentally handicapped three year old who is entertained by cobwebs and the word the?
THE JESTER: Jester holds the ace of spades, jester feels the cutting blades. Watch him die upon the stage. Watch him die but still all smile, pour upon the growing pile. Watch as laughter fills your ears, entertainment be thy name.
THE KING: Yeah, well apparently entertainment doesn’t be your name because this is about as entertaining as a conversation with a pile of plague infested dung. And so help me, I damn well will smile as I watch you die if you don’t do Goddamn something to actually entertain me and make me laugh. Jesus Christ, what am I paying you for?
THE JESTER: The jester is just here to advise his king, so that his heart it may sing, a smile to replace forever frown, in a kingdom seeming forever burning down, I am the jester, I am the clown. And I do it all, for the crown! I do it all for my king, so that his heart, it may sing.
THE KING: Yeah, well my heart is singing right now, and you want to know what the name of the song it’s singing is, it’s called “Guards get the hell in here and drag the jester off and cut his damn head off!”
(GUARDS 7 AND 8 enter.)
GUARDS 7 AND 8: Yes, my king, did you summon us.
THE KING: Yeah, I summoned you to drag the jester out of here and cut his damn head off.
GUARDS 7 AND 8: At once my king.
THE JESTER: Very well my king, I am only glad I was able to provide you with the entertainment you sought and that the jester can go to his final resting place, knowing he was able to fulfill his service to the crown. So I will depart with these words that I very much hope will allow you to better see to the custodianship of the kingdom. Sometimes when the shit starts to fall, it really starts to pile, so beware wading too deep into your own mess, or Gomer could be a goner and a loner in distress. So do not stab yourself through the heart with a red hot poker, instead listen to my words and laugh, the words of the joker. And so my king, always stay on top of your racket, I’m going to go blow out my brains now with a full metal jacket.
THE KING: O.k, that made the least freakin amount of sense of anything that any moron has ever spouted in the history of the world. Guards, after you cut his head off, cut it off again.
GUARDS 7 AND 8: Yes, my king.
THE KING: Now get out of my sight, you worthless, useless douche.
THE JESTER: (THE JESTER bows.) The jester is but here to please.
(GUARDS 7 AND 8 lead THE JESTER off.)
THE KING: So help me, that was the least funny court jester there has ever been. (THE KING just sits there thinking with much agitation.) Come on dude, come up with something to do this day. This day is not going well. (THE KING is thinking, appearing he may have an idea.) Maybe I should, I don’t know, maybe I should come up with a manifesto, a statement of rule for the kingdom, a plan from which to govern from. Yes, that would seem a productive use of my time and indeed the best use of it to ensure the smooth, effective jurisdiction of the kingdom. Now then, let’s commit my thoughts to paper. (pulls out paper and a quill pen and looks at it a moment then starts feverishly writing) Ah yes (writes) Very wise indeed (writes) Why, genius if I do say so myself. (writes) Almost done, just the finishing touches. (writes) And voila, it is done. Now then, I should really try it out on a smaller audience before delivering my proclamation to the entire kingdom. Guards!
(GUARDS 7 AND 8 enter)
GUARDS 7 AND 8: Yes my king?
THE KING: Kindly stand there and listen to the doctrine I have written concerning my ruling of the kingdom and the state of the union.
GUARDS 7 AND 8: Indeed my king.
THE KING: Now then (clears throat) I want to bathe in blood, my own. Messiah, martyr, my infant sea. Drown myself, staring up at nothing, through air too thick to breathe. I want to run in circles, to shake my sorry hand. I want to fall through caverns, to the empire of the damned. I want to burn in candles, melt my life away. Broken day and night, choking for a glimpse of sight, of something outside the eye. Reduce the night to cinders, the embers in my eye, reduce the screams to whispers, a silent bleeding cry. I will sit upon my throne tonight, and stare out upon my battlefield, and curse both sides, and turn away, and awake, into the day, and face another firing squad. Blind man to the chopping block. (pause) So tell me, what did you think?
GUARD 7: Why, genius my king, pure genius.
GUARD 8: Why a better, more well thought out plan for running a kingdom, never has there been.
GUARD 7: The way you captured the essence of the times, and how you put it into practice for the kingdom, the way it, you know.
GUARD 8: What it could do for the kingdom, for the people, for the, what it did.
GUARD 7: Why I stand here in awe my king.
GUARD 8: A more prudent and wise ruler, never has there been.
(pause)
THE KING: Alright, that’s it, the both of you, report to the execution chamber to have your heads chopped off.
GUARDS 7 AND 8: But my king, we, we, praised your plan with the finest words we know.
THE KING: Yeah, but you didn’t say them with feeling. So go on, get out of here, go to the execution chamber and have your heads chopped off.
GUARDS 7 AND 8: At once my king. For the crown!
(exit GUARDS 7 AND 8)
THE KING: Man, do the headaches never end around here? And I still have to figure out something to do today. But what? So help me, this day needs direction or it truly will be the death of me. But how to find that direction? (pause, THE KING thinking) Of course, why I should just consult with my God. Surely the God of the kingdom can provide me with the guidance as to what it is that I should do with this day. Yes, that is what I shall do indeed. (THE KING looks ahead.) God, I could really use your guidance and your assistance. So if you can hear me, please, oh divine one, reveal yourself to me. (After a pause the lights start to flicker, the flickering becomes more rapid and then the stage goes dark. After a time, the lights slowly return to full, and there is a large cloud of smoke on the stage, it dissipates to reveal, now standing on the stage, SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT.) Scumgor, God of the Broken Night, oh divine heart of the kingdom, you have come to counsel me!
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: That I have child, so worry not, all will be well, for Scumgor, God of the Broken Night is here to assist you.
THE KING: I’m so relieved, this day really was not going well, but now that you’re here, what could possibly go wrong?
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: Tell me, my king, how is it I might aid you.
THE KING: Well, you see, it’s just, well, I’m having troubles and could really use some guidance.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: Absolutely my king, what exactly would be the nature of your troubles?
THE KING: Well, you see, I’m trying but really just can’t seem to, well, I can’t figure out what to do today.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: I see, I see, indeed that is a problem. Tell me, have you tried having the heads chopped off of some of your guards?
THE KING: A bunch of them. To be perfectly honest, I’m not even sure if I have any guards left at this point. Wait, hold on a second. Guards!
(GUARDS 9 AND 10 enter.)
GUARDS 9 AND 10: Yes my king?
THE KING: Oh, yeah, fine, whatever, get the hell out of here.
GUARDS 9 AND 10: At once my king.
(exit GUARDS 9 AND 10)
THE KING: Wait, wait, come back here.
(GUARDS 9 AND 1O enter.)
GUARDS 9 AND 10: Yes my king?
THE KING: Go have your heads chopped off.
GUARDS 9 AND 10: At once my king. For the crown!
(exit GUARDS 9 AND 10)
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: Did that help?
THE KING: No, not even a little, what’s wrong with me?
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: I see, I see. You are in dire straits indeed. It’s a good thing you called me.
THE KING: Do you think you can help me?
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: Well I’m damn well going to try. Tell me something king, how would you say your rule is going?
THE KING: Not very well, actually. I don’t really know what I’m doing, and to be perfectly honest I don’t really like it.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: I see.
THE KING: I mean, on the surface, you’d think it would be a pretty good job. Pay would be pretty good, flexible hours, be your own boss, but to tell you the truth, this job really sucks.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: Hmm, go on.
THE KING: The thing of it is, I’m really not comfortable with the whole being in power thing. And I think that maybe there’s a possibility that I’m abusing my authority, maybe. I think there’s a possibility that could conceivably be said. And people may not realize this but I really don’t like doing that, it causes me a lot of anxiety.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: Tell me, king, are you saying you are considering abdicating the throne, actually quitting being king to go find other work instead?
THE KING: I think maybe I am, but what other job do you think I should get if I did?
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: Well that depends of course on what you want to do, that’s the most important thing.
THE KING: Yeah, but that’s just it, I don’t really have any clue what I would want to do or what kind of job I would like.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: Well, let’s brainstorm here, off the top of your head, tell me something you like.
THE KING: I like cows.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: You could find something that involves cows, sure you could work with cows. Come on, something else.
THE KING: I really can’t think of anything else to tell you the truth.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: Let me toss a few suggestions out there. You tell me what you think. How about working in the corner store?
THE KING: I don’t know, never done that before, maybe.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: Tilling the fields?
THE KING: I don’t even, well, to be perfectly honest, really know what tilling actually is, but it would be outdoors so that might actually be nice.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: Basket weaving?
THE KING: Um, I have no idea how to weave baskets.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: Is it something you would like to learn?
THE KING: Um, I see absolutely no reason why I would possibly want to.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: You know what, this is all unnecessary, you’ve already said something you would like doing, working with cows. So you just get some job working with cows, you already have your answer.
THE KING: Wait, Scumgor, does that mean you are counseling me that I should abdicate the throne?
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: You know, king, why I am absolutely certain that that would be a much better situation for you and you would be much happier and it is definitely what you should do. You can trust me on that. I am Scumgor, God of the Broken Night after all. It would definitely be the right choice.
THE KING: O.k, o.k then, you know, I think you’re right, then that’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to quit being king and give up the throne.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: And go work with cows.
THE KING: And go work with cows. Alright then, it’s official, I’m going to abdicate the throne and go work with cows. (sighs) Ah, I feel better already. You know, it’s a lot of pressure being king.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: Not much pressure working with cows.
THE KING: No, I don’t imagine there would be. So that’s what I’m going to do. Thank you, thank you so much, I can’t tell you how much I appreciate this.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: No need to thank me king, excuse me, no need to thank me, worker with cows. But I really must be off now.
THE KING: Of course, by all means, but again, really, thank you, I really was in a heck of a bind and I don’t know what I would have done without your guidance.
SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT: Hey, I’m Scumgor, God of the Broken Night, it’s what I do. And tell me, would I lie to you?
(SCUMGOR, GOD OF THE BROKEN NIGHT flashes an ominous, sinister smile. The stage goes dark, and when the light returns, he is gone.)
THE KING: Very well then, time to do this and just have it done. Guards, send in my advisor. Eh, send in my new advisor.
(THE ADVISOR 2 enters.)
THE ADVISOR 2: Yes my king, what can I do for you?
THE KING: I wanted to inform you that I have decided to abdicate the throne. As my advisor I imagine you would be the one in charge of determining my successor, seeing as how I have no children.
THE ADVISOR 2: Um, my king, I don’t understand.
THE KING: It’s quite simple actually, I’m giving up the throne and thought you should know so you could begin the process of choosing who it is that will replace me.
THE ADVISOR 2: But, my king, there is no choice to be made, you are the king. This can’t be done.
THE KING: Actually it can and already has been done. I’m certain you can find someone who will adequately fill the role as well as I did. (slight pause) Actually I’m entirely certain it would be extremely difficult to not do that, so get to it.
THE ADVISOR 2: No, no, no, my king, you really don’t understand. We cannot choose someone to replace you, for you are the king, and you are the king in service to the crown. It cannot be done.
THE KING: Well as I made very clear it already has been done. I am no longer king of this kingdom.
THE ADVISOR 2: My king, my king, think of the crown, you can not do this. Nothing has been done yet, please retire to your chambers and think this through, I’m sure you will then see the folly of your words.
THE KING: Damn it advisor, it is your job to advise and that you have done, and I am telling you I am rejecting your advice.
THE ADVISOR 2: But my king, I advise for the crown.
THE KING: Advice taking into consideration. But I am now telling you I already have thought it through and I have already made up my mind. I have abdicated the throne, I am no longer king, it is already done.
THE ADVISOR 2: Is that then your final decision as king?
THE KING: Yes, for I am no longer king. Get it through your head, I am not the king anymore.
THE ADVISOR 2: Very well then. I see your decision is final. Guards. (GUARDS 11 AND 12 enter) Please take the king into custody and have his head chopped off for crimes against the crown.
(GUARDS 11 AND 12 grab the king.)
THE KING: What? What is this? You can’t do this to me, why I am the king.
THE ADVISOR 2: (shakes his head) No, you are not the king anymore. (THE ADVISOR 2 removes the crown from THE KING’s head and places it onto his own.) Guards prepare the criminal for execution for crimes against the crown.
GUARD 11: (strikes THE KING with a punch) You mingy cur. Death is too good for you.
GUARD 12: (strikes THE KING by kicking him then spits on him) It’s people like you trying to tarnish the crown that make me sick.
(GUARDS 11 AND 12 hold the king, then one leaves while the other keeps him restrained, the guard who left returning, wheeling a guillotine to the center of the stage. The two guards set the king up on the ground, his head through the guillotine. THE ADVISOR 2 positions himself behind the guillotine to be the one to release the blade. THE ADVISOR 2 raises his arm above his head.)
THE ADVISOR 2: The king is dead. Long live the crown.
(THE ADVISOR 2 releases the blade as it comes down towards THE KING’s neck and the stage goes dark.)
(BLACKOUT)
THE END