Part One: The Question of God

I see Life as one universal question mark, with each of us huddled together rotating similar doubts upon the planetary dot that dangles as if detached below. Wonder is to me among the most fantastic gifts on Earth. Particularly beautiful are those inquiries that have no definitive responses. These ever-present thoughts don’t leave us for as long as we choose to turn to them, evolving like friendship if we take the time to invest ourselves, and avoid growing discouraged. They hang with us.

With so many vital issues present in the air, though, we tend to feel so small, burdened, bullied…!

….is there a God/ Supreme Being of unfathomable power? we ask feeling very much alone, while another hesitation nags at our back: “Does it matter?” Would exist or not exist change our ideal of human behavior? My response is No, it should not. Then, it matters very little, if at all. I’m no atheist. In my mind the word presses it self into existence as real idea. Intangible as a Pegasus, but there it is, undeniably already articulated, even if unimagined: “God.”

…if He/She exists can we mere humans see Him/Her? To me God is beyond image, being Imagination Itself. My personal conviction is that God is all that is—there hiding in plain sight!! Whether we open our eyes or close them, there is God: within, without; as the whole of the world, which we will never decipher. God is, period. We find throughout various esteemed philosophical texts that God is described as “I am:” a phrase we use ourselves, as demi-gods. Often in the most trivial verbiage… failing to acknowledge that we are mouthpieces of God. I am tired… I am mad… I am unable… I am weak… I am stupid… I am bad… Much blasphemy that goes unrecognized.

…why do people suffer?! is a question of fundamental misconception, trailing from the preceding lack of recognition—in my assessment. If God is all that there is, then let's see this issue without the falsely envisioned trenches. When we separate ourselves from God we misconstrue that it is a pitiful “me” or "you" who is on the firing line, while the Almighty God stands by and does nothing. The inseparable togetherness that I perceive does not permit this division. It is God who suffers, and God who rejoices. We lend voice to this temporal response of the Infinite, but it is not really the individual “me” or "you" that bleeds, or bruises, or falls apart. Likewise, the credit is not “mine” or "your's" when anyone of us declares success. That does not mean that we are not to act with compassion towards one another and our very own selves, striving to lessen hardship. I see each one of us as a vessel, perhaps a vape would be an apt metaphor? The body filled with Holy Spirit, temporarily carried like breath. It passes through me in exhalation, inhaled by someone else. If not withheld, this is a force that resuscitates and uplifts. It’s an intensely intimate exchange disguised very much like an ordinary conversation.

We speak to the Universe, and it answers. It always does. It speaks with many tongues, in languages we do not always identify—beyond words, signs, sounds or touch—in an endless array of propositions. Showing off a complete immersion in invention; one that we directly partake in. I see it as a constant back and forth, a give and take feed. Despite our own frequent declarations that we just don't comprehend why this or that exists, we find it hard to refrain from judging! Mostly we don’t grasp with much depth, and on reflection regret this fact... but sometimes we have the wondrous sensation that we “understand.”

(Take this binary dialogue that you and I are having right now… it’s like making contact with an extraterrestrial, is it not? A miracle that we articulate in a common decoding, each of us out there, somewhere, no where really… perhaps already gone. By the time you read this so much has already changed for the author. These initial thoughts are herein encoded… ended! But the Thinking goes on… transferred now to weigh upon your mind, even if mine has passed on. An omniverse of consciousness; Is that not the transcendentalism of God?)

…has He/She given us free will?! The Infinite is forever proposing. The beauty of it is that we seem to be able to make counter propositions. I see the Creator as always extending a dynamic “invisible hand,” and we can choose to grasp it—with abandonment to absolute faith. Or, retract our arms behind our backs and sit out the dance with self-doubt. Worse yet, we can possibly decide to hiss in animosity at the sincerity of the invitation. What we embrace, grows; what we reject festers—since a proposition once postulated never goes away! 

As I see it, our human distinction is the capacity to stand in Opposition… God offers; we need not accept. No choice is without consequence hence we have tremendous power to Redirect, even though as part-and-parcel we never Direct… this is, for the moment, my understanding of our relationship with God and of the nature of Free Will.