The Deathbed Fantasy

My last breath will most likely be as mundane as it can get. None of us get to choose our death and upholding the illusion that a peaceful end where we get to plan our last words and thoughts is harmful. Statistically how likely is one to die in bed, conscious and able to reflect on who they were? Too low to justify the widespread fantasy that all of us continue to perpetuate within our minds.

The end of your being is not a nuisance that you can ignore so that you can casually ask yourself "Did I do well? Did my life had an impact? Oh, my last words! I almost forgot, ha silly me. Hmm, let me think, ah yes perfect these will do...“ Dying is painful work and rarely can one enjoy the serenity of a deathbed, surrounded by those they love while being able to ignore their own suffering in the name of their last words. Most of us will make one step on the sidewalk, hear the screeching of tires and before you can even think of saying "Richard, after so many years I'm finally going to see you again in heaven." you're dead or you go unconscious only to die before you wake up. Sad to say, but most of our deaths will come out of nowhere. One moment a person will be minding their own mundane busyness and the very next they will cease to be.

Thus, thinking of your last words is a pointless very pointless exercise fuelled by the belief that your end will be meaningful because you will get the chance to finish the story the way you want it to finish. In reality, some die before they can even have thoughts so why should the rest of us expect that the world would treat our story with any respect when others have had theirs end before they have even started?

However, not all is doom and gloom as even though I might choke on the peanuts that I am eating while writing this, I am still lucky enough to have been alive. Instead, what we should focus on is reflection. Reflection on our life as often as we can just in case that deathbed fantasy never comes our way. If it does then we have had plenty of practice. However, if it does not then one could not say that they have been cheated a proper end because they have often summarised it in their lifetime. Similarly, to typing in a document one can often come back to the summarization of their life and add to it by reflecting on themselves. This way even if they die out of nowhere, there is a file that they have made of themselves for themselves, which contains their ideal ending. It is not a perfect end; no one will see this finished file, but it is an improvement over waiting for the deathbed fantasy only to then die without reflecting anything about yourself. We need to reflect as much as we can while we are alive and well, because the chance to do so might never come.

Time for another peanu– *starts chocking*