For you.

I have a secret,

festering in my mind,

bugging me all the time,

I know it’s not right,

But it fills me up inside,

Twists me like lemon rind,

And you’d find it all so funny,

Your eyes, so dark they’re almost muddy,

My heart, so broken bruised and bloody,

When you left,

Your footprints on the ground I’d study,

For clues, for anything,

For just one fucking thing,

To make it hurt a little less,

To find relief among distress,

To wring the rags and hide the mess,

The mess of a thing you left behind...

This girl, one sad girl,

Wounds cut long ago healed now enough to show,

My face and eyes hold steady glow,

But my mind of course was last to know,

You hang here now, and you won’t go,

You are the secret I hold within my mind...

I should not miss you, we cannot talk,

But I catch glimpses, roads we used to walk,

Our memories still etched in chalk one day before the rain...

And on these nights you fill my head,

It makes no sense,

There’s a beautiful boy here in my bed,

He loves me more than you ever did,

But still I hang on to what you said

One million lifetimes ago.