Stop Telling Me I’m Crazy

(Everything I write turns into poetry... this challenge, I started with a poem because I'm absentminded. Then, when I reread the challenge, I tried a bit of some prose at the end... Still, sort of turned into poetry.)

Water like oceans

flying like birds

twisting like dragons

without words.

Too many choices.

Tunnels in caves.

The lists are all voices

that ramble and rave

on and on.

Get to work.

It doesn't hurt.

You aren't afraid.

Stillness like tree roots.

Movement like soil.

The company of fools.

The serenity in toil.

The threat of the morning.

The promise of night.

When the future is mourning

the past is fright.

There was a call. Yesterday. For you. I couldn't take it. I was busy, but they left a message.

No.

I forget what they said.

I must have wrote it down somewhere. I've been looking through these notebooks. Lots of messages. No names. No signatures.

Crying? You have?

Oh... no. I haven't. I mean, I did earlier. I just can't sleep.

You know you really ought to get those lists taken care of... they'll only get longer. You never finish anything.

That's not true. I know. I shouldn't talk like that. I really do love you... but not that part. Yeah, that one.

And that one.

You should have chosen more wisely. It's not like you had it so bad. You can't blame it all on your dad. You can't blame it on the lack of him either. You can only blame yourself.

Talk about something else? Well, what about that fucking electric bill? Or maybe we should discuss how many hours you have until work tomorrow and the sleep you aren't getting? Or the things you put into your body? Or don't? Or all those appointments you haven't kept?

Yes, yes. What about the ones you have? It feels nice to keep one's word, and hold your nerve. It feels good to serve. That's why you do it, isn't it? That's not selfless... you liar and cheat. Using others for absolution. You should be ashamed.

You should be asleep. How many hours was that again? You have to keep this job. Kids aren't cheap. I know you have to know all the things they need.

Okay, I'll calm down. We'll calm down. Let's breathe. Don't forget the mask. Without it, you can't sleep. And that makes you weak.