The Worst Feeling

you aren't gone yet,

but you're going away.

and when you leave, you'll leave a trail of stars

dotting the galaxy,

screaming "I was here"

in case I ever forget you.

I'll follow your stars,

but they'll lead me back to where we're standing now.

your voice will drift in from the heavens, your

it's alright it's alright again and again

like some eternal answering machine.

that's the worst feeling.

at first it'll burn my tongue

and then its fire will travel down my throat,

and I'll wonder how it once felt to breathe

and know that you were breathing also.

then, you will feel galaxies away

and the fire inside of me will become coal in my stomach

and settle there.

the truth will feel like a thousand dead stars

that still burn in the sky because I am light years away

and from here you still burn brightly

because

you are still alive.

but you tell me you are going

and that you've packed up your bags

so I guess the worst feeling is that

sometimes it's as if you've really left

and if I stare at you too hard you disappear.

you aren't gone yet,

and thank god for that.

you've got one foot in the next life

and I'm holding onto the part of you that's still here,

that's still holding on,

that doesn't really want to let go.

so

it doesn't hurt as much

now.