I Don’t Understand Why (Challenge)
(@stripedAbyss)
Mommy?
I don't understand why you don't listen to me.
I don't understand why you don't hear me.
Why don't you?
Mommy?
What are you doing that is so much more important than me?
Is it your job that consumes you?
Is it your job to sit on the couch all day, on your phone, staring from screen to screen?
Mommy?
I don't understand...
Isn't it your job to take care of me?
Mommy?
I don't understand why you ignore me.
I colored a picture for you, but that was months ago, and it now seems to have dulled in the dusty light coming through the dirty kitchen windows.
Mommy.
I don't understand why I have to do the dishes.
I don't understand why I have to do all the cleaning.
I can't even reach the fucking sink.
Mommy?
I don't understand where you went?
Somewhere far off where all you can see is what you want, which is not me.
That much I understand.
Mommy? Oh Mom.
I don't understand why Dad left.
Was it me?
I don't understand why my little brother James isn't coming back from the hospital.
Mommy.....
I don't understand....I'm still here....I'm still alive.
I don't...
I don't understand why you don't love me...
Why don't you love me?
Why can't you understand me?
MOMMY?! I AM STILL HERE. UNDERSTAND THAT. I NEED YOU. WHY CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT EVEN THOUGH THEY'RE GONE I REMAIN AND I'M STILL A CHILD THAT YOU NEED TO LOVE. A-a child you need to care for. A child you need to take places and hug, and punish and reward and-and.....and.....
A child you can understand.
Why can't you see that everyday I'm aging past my own body and soon I will be too old, my bones becoming dust, blowing in the wind, mimicking your love for me. Gone.
Mommy?
I miss you.
I love you.
I don't understand why you can't come back....
I don't understand why you can't miss me.
I don't understand why you can't love me...
Why don't you?
Mommy?