may 6th
something about the moonlight
something about how every star in the sky disappeared
and made their way into your eyes
between the stupid jokes we shared
and the alcohol slowing guiding me away
from all sense of judgement
i started falling
suddenly it was just you and me
never mind our friend in my backseat
slowly passing out from one sip too many
you
me
us
somehow i found myself looking at you
longing to be with you
i took one more sip and started my own undoing
i wanted to be with you for so long
you did?
i do
you know i’ve always felt we’ve connected on such an intimate level
i’m not drunk enough for this
i was drowning in you
every part of me started screaming your name
my body trembled
aching to curl itself around you
why didn’t you tell me?
i don’t know i just kinda figured–
if you asked my answer would have been yes
i didnt even know if you liked girls
i’d still say yes
my phone vibrated in my hand
dragging me back to earth
of course it would be my boyfriend
i don’t want to get in between you guys
i love him
but if it doesn’t work out–
don’t
i want to give us a try
you reached for the bottle
i wanted to take it from you
kiss you
softly at first
then maybe–
no
i can’t
i won’t
i love him
but god look at you
you rested your head on your hand and looked at me
god i want you
your hands tangled in my hair
legs clenched around me
never mind our friend passed out in my back seat
it’s you and me
no
i love him
but god you look so beautiful
you always look so beautiful
no
you reached again for the bottle
drunkenly talking about your past hookups
my phone vibrated again
yes i love him but why must i love you too
give me one night
one beautiful night with you
your back arched
your lips parted as shallow breaths escape
if i had one night
i’d ask you for one more
then another
and another
getting drunk off of you
drowing myself in you
i love him i love him i love him
it sounds fake but i truly do love him
more than i can even fathom
but then there’s you
i love you
i love you
i love you