better.

"How've you been?" someone will ask.

I sigh and quickly think of an answer. I decide on "better."

It's true. I have been better. Better than I was a year ago. Better than I was 3 years ago. Better than I've been in a long time. I've been in an uphill battle for more than 3 years and I'm finally healing. So yes- I'm better.

They fake a smile, or maybe it's real, and move on with their lives.

I've found in my battle that part of my depression was a choice. It was easier to hate myself, it was easier to not care, it was easier to _____, you fill in the blank. Once I chose to make a better life for myself, things got better. Not all at once, but slowly. By choosing to love myself, I started to see all of the beauty around me. It is not the easy path, it is the path less traveled but it is the path that we need to travel. The one that eventually takes us out of the forrest and into the grassy area of truly being okay.

There will be relapses on the path, there will be twists and turns but there is light at the end of the tunnel. Trust me.