Harry Situation Reviews: The Predator
If it bleeds, we can kill it.
The Predator is the newest entry in the Predator franchise, featuring everyone’s favorite intergalactic trophy hunter, the Predators (otherwise known as the Yautja). This time around, an army sniper (played by Boyd Holbrook) comes in contact with a pair of Predators—one normal and one that’s much bigger and upgraded—that are wreaking havoc on suburbia, USA. He teams up with fellow soldiers that are a bit unstable (featuring the likes of Keegan-Michael Key, Alfie Allen, and Thomas Jane) against these hunters. Also Olivia Munn is in here as a scientist studying the Predators, and Jacob Tremblay is here as Boyd’s autistic son that can understand languages.
As much as I’m a huge fan of this creature and of the original Arnold Schwartzneggar movie, I definitely had some concerns about this film. Watching the trailers didn’t put my mind at ease, and what’s worse is that the film is written and directed by Shane Black. Let’s talk about him for a minute. Shane Black was actually one of the original actors in Predator, playing as Arnold’s glasses wearing, girlfriend’s vagina joke making commando Hawkins. You’d think this would give the film an edge. Heck, he’s proven to be a capable film director and writer having made great films like Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and The Nice Guys. But he also wrote and directed Iron Man 3, and I personally disliked that movie, believing it to be the worst of the Marvel Cinematic Universe films. So yeah, you can understand my concern.
The Predator movies need a serious kick to get them back to the original film’s glory. That, or a new Predator/Alien game. Not one film in the series, including the two AVP films, have been able to match up to the original. So maybe this will be the one to do so. So, how does this one hold up? To borrow a quote from Arnold from the first Predator, “YOU SET US UP! It’s all bullshit! All of it!”
I remember an interview that featured director Shane Black, and there he stated that this sequel was going to be the scariest one of the bunch. He lied. There is nothing scary about this movie, mainly because there’s absolutely no suspense in this movie at all. Hell, the movie is played more as a comedy than an action horror. Seriously, there are one too many jokes made in this movie, and that’s where it suffers the most. The jokes made in this movie are not funny. Well, technically. I did laugh at a couple jokes, mainly of how cheesy they were. There’s one in particular where the regular Predator slaughters a truck full of soldiers, and the driver asks if everything was alright back there, and the Predator takes this severed arm and gives the driver a thumbs up. That was a little funny to me. But why did this movie have to be a comedy? There’s a space alien that skins people and rips their spines out. That should be shit-your-pants scary!
But my biggest gripe is its overall story. So this new Predator, dubbed the Upgraded Predator, is some kind of experiment done on his own people and he has the DNA of multiple species to be the ultimate hunter. I seriously doubt any member of the Yautja species, especially from the clan elders, would ever allow such a thing to happen. Not only that but Jacob Tremblay’s character manages to crack the Predator code in a matter of minutes? Look, I don’t doubt that because of his form of autism that he’s likely to do so. I’m autistic myself. But I have to call bullshit because it really does not fit in something like Predator. Hell, there was a moment where the Upgraded Predator is hunting down Tremblay, and that’s a huge violation of the Predator’s code of honor. Not to mention that none of these Predators are doing their shit stealthfully. So basically the secrets out that there are Predators existing, which is another violation of their code. My point is that much that goes on in this movie shits on the lore, and it’s just overall bad storytelling.
There is also little characterization in this movie. All of these characters only have quips and querks. Even the ones that are suppose to be intimidating and serious, but they make one too many jokes that you cannot take them seriously. Hell, I don’t even remember their character names, mostly because I really didn’t care for any of them.
And the ending... oh my god, that fucking ending is just stupid. Just... fuck!
But is there anything good I can say about this movie? Well, despite have little characterization, the acting is pretty good. I mean, the all deliver believable performances. And the Predators are still cool. They’re doing what they usually do. I especially like the design for the regular Predator. And there were some pretty cool, gory kills. That’s all I got, I’m afraid.
Guys, this movie was a huge disappointment, and is definitely the worst of the Predator movies. The only other positive to come out of this movie is that I got to see it with my dad, who is a fan of the original film too, and he thought this movie wasn’t too bad. He actually gives the movie a C, and I respect that. He got more enjoyment in this movie than I did. If you’ve seen it by now and like it, more power to you. I just really didn’t like this movie, and I don’t think Shane Black should be allowed to do any franchises after this one.
Positives:
-Acting
-Some cool kills
Negatives:
-The comedy
-No suspense
-Bad story
-Weak characterization
-Craps on Predator lore
-The ending
Final Grade: F
It’s a little sad that the only worthwhile sequels of the Predator series is Alien vs Predator and Predators, which, in truth, aren’t bad movies at all. I just wish that the Predator franchise had a movie of their own that was like how Aliens was for the Alien franchise.
So that’s my disappointed thoughts on The Predator. A movie so disappointing that The Nun is actually better. I fucking kid you not! Have you seen it? What were your thoughts? Please be kind, leave a like and comment, and check out more reviews here on Prose!
Also, thank you to all those that followed and read my Predator Countdown reviews, leading up to this movie. If anyone is curious about my thoughts on those movies, you can check out the following links to those reviews below:
Predator: https://theprose.com/post/205724/harry-situation-s-countdown-reviews-predator
Predator 2: https://theprose.com/post/211579/harry-situation-s-countdown-reviews-predator-2
AVP: https://theprose.com/post/214160/harry-situation-reviews-alien-vs-predator
AVPR: https://theprose.com/post/218179/harry-situation-s-countdown-reviews-aliens-vs-predator-requiem
Predators: https://theprose.com/post/222936/harry-situation-s-countdown-reviews-predators
Best Quote:
Quinn McKenna: “What are you?”
Ultimate Predator: “What are you?”
Quinn McKenna: “Shut the fuck up.”
#harrysituationreviews #predator #scifi #action #horror #film #opinion #thismoviesucks