People Who Don’t Matter

I'm all for pop culture. I take time to appease my inner nerd. I even have celebrity crushes (Joan Jett, Stevie Nicks respectively). However, my life decisions are never based on the musings of my favorite celebrities. So, when did the opinions of celebrities become so important?

Glancing at the news on the internet I see stories such as, "Gwyneth Paltro Discusses Her Views on Parenting" Don't get me wrong, everyone is entitled to their opinion, but what so special about Gwyneth's? Did she study child psychology? Has she done quantitative research on the styles of child rearing and their outcomes? I'm guessing no. On top of that, this is the woman who expoused the practice of women shoving rocks up their mommy parts as a means to regulate hormones and menstrual cycle. Do you really want .parenting advice from someone who treats her vagina like a rock tumbler? Probably not. So why, does she deserve any kind of article in the "News" section of my internet browser?

Oh, and it doesn't stop there! We are drawn to the vapidness of the Kardashian clan like retarded mosquitos to a bug zapper. I am still dumbfounded by the image that made the news of a Kardashian (not sure which one, all idiots look alike to me) in the oval office. Take away the fact that our "President" has made the Executive Branch look like freak show, we are now giving one of these stellar examples of feminine virtue time to discuss policy with the president? Why would any world leader (even President Cheeto Faced Sleaze Ball) find it advantageous to speak with her? What could she possibly offer? Was she there to discuss the spread of sexually transmitted diseases? Granted she is probably the closest thing to a walking, talking petri dish culture of every known strain of antibiotic-resistant gonorrhea and chlamydia known to man. Still, I am not sure she has much to offer in the way of advice. World hunger? Increased tensions with Russia? Our nation's substandard education system? Na, cancel my meeting with the UN. I want to talk to one of those girls who have had more NBA players inside them than the Staples Center.

There you have it, my two cents. It all boils down to this. You can watch their movies and get their autographs. Hell, you can even buy their brand of perfume, but don’t make their opinions matter more to you than those who actually know what the fuck they’re talking about. Now if you will excuse me, I must read this article discussing Snoop Dogg’s feelings about the crisis in North Korea and how it relates to the global economy.