Throwback Thursday.

I was sitting down on my bed, randomly scrolling through prose, when suddenly this idea struck me. During my time here in prose, I felt that my writing developed and it improved and finally thought I was going somewhere.

I wanted to see how my writing progressed and how it changed over the months. So I thought: What if I took my first post on prose and then, re-wrote it? I still can't believe it has only been five months I was sure that it has at least been a year.

When I first came here to prose, to be honest, I didn't know what was I doing. I wanted somewhere where I could share my writing: the good and the bad. I stumbled on the week challenges of prose, found it interesting, so I went for it and did it. Re-reading my entry again, It was not bad, surprisingly. The idea behind what I wanted to write was conveyed. It's just some spelling mistakes and how I wrote and structured some parts, that I felt could be improved. To challenge myself, I tried not to dratically change the whole text.

Origanal text: The proposal.

Delicate, pale fingers pushed gently at piano keys. Black and white. Notes blended togather creating a beautiful melody. Gentle. Slow. light. Warm.

Drifting off, the notes traveled across the vast room - full of people. The Music reached their ears.

The tempo increased, fingers pushing harshly agianst the keys. Notes blended togather tellling a story. His story - Their story. Sad. Happy.

The melody travelled futher across the room. A women sat in the room, silent tears of happiness running down her face. She understood. The notes floated around her carring a thousand feeling. One message.

-Marry me.

Improvement:

With elegance, pale fingers feathered the black and white keys. Gentle, slow, light-- warm. Notes harmonised, flowing outwards; drifting across the vast room brimmed with people. Blessing ears with rich music.

As the tempo increased, the fingers danced along the keys, twirling and twisting. Notes clashed. Powerful waves spread further and further; delving into the hearts of the audience. It told a story, pulsing with a thousand feeling.

One message:

Marry me

In the audience, a woman smiled, tears of happiness running down her face.

Yes, she responds.

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So what do you think?