Shaky Foundation
I built my belief on you
The idea that there was good
And that the bad I had
Was strange caz
You were normal
I built my hope on you
My hope of one who was good
In spite of all the bad
I was glad
You were different
You claimed a foundation
Strong
Solid
You told me to lean on
You
A load bearer
But imagine my surprise
When crumbling walls
Began to collide
And you could no longer hide
You were failing
As the ground around you sank
I realized that
Your soil was quick sand
Not a rock on which I could stand
Any longer
Liar
Imposter
Father
Man
Was there ever a chance
I would trust
Again
Self doubt
Self hate
Suicide
Contemplating
The very thing you made me enjoy
Life
But I guess it was my fault
Because yours rubbed together
Earthquaking my idea of
A Father
My dad
My father
My protector
No more
In a way it is good
Now that I no longer lean
On your ever failing arm
I’ve called the one
Who hears
The wiper of
My tears
Run daily
But I know I have help
A comforter
Teacher
Reminder of all things pure
Lovely
Just
And of a good report
Maybe it’s a good thing
If your facade never broke
I would still be in a boat
Waiting to sink
In the lies
I don’t hate you
I’m not angry
I just see clearly
Now the pain is gone
I now build on the rock
That is much higher than
I
Build on the corner stone
On whom I can rely
No more shaky foundations
No more uncertainty
Only peace
Surpassing all understanding