Trying to Outswim my Depression

Some days, my depression is as little as a beachball thrown into the ocean, other days, my depression is the ocean.

Pulling me into the deep unknown, drowning me in my thoughts of self-harm and darkness.

Sometimes I almost make it back to shore, where the safety of the sand is felt between my toes and the sun on my back quickly dries up the fears of my own mind.

But that's only sometimes.

Nine times out of ten I'm dragged back out again where the ground is stolen out from under me and the clouds kidnap the sun.