Little Green Men

On earth, sometime during the nineteenth century, a calm night lay over the city. Gaslight created patterns of light and dark in the streets. Inside the houses - with the possible exception of lovers, poets, writers and criminals – people slept.

The ethereal form of a ghost floated over rooftops. The ghost was a male, dressed in Errol Flynn type flamboyant but ghastly white dress. He seemed a youngish soul with average looks.

“I thought once you are a ghost, all cravings ended,” he said to himself, “but I need my daily fix of the written word now as I did in my corporeal form.”

Down below, he spotted a huge stone building in the midst of a clearing. A board on the building read: "CENTRAL LIBRARY"

He floated down and entered the building through the wall.

He looked at the bookshelves, his surroundings lit with an eerie light emanating from his body. “What shall I read?” He stopped at a shelf labelled “GHOST STORIES”.

Nah! Too mundane, he thought. May be some escapist reading. He moved toward the shelf labelled "POLITICS".

On another planet, at an army base, little green men discussed the plan to conquer earth. The Commander was seated at a huge table in a huge room. An ensign stood respectfully before him.

“The scout is back from the target planet, Sir,” the ensign reported. “The planet has sentient life of a form very similar to our own, but intellectually they are far inferior. They do not have nuclear power or computers. They have just started experimenting with electricity.”

“The troop been hypno-fed with the language recordings brought by the scout?”

“Yes.”

“Then prepare the invasion tube.”

Back on earth, in the clearing beside the library, a sphere of light appeared, and from it emerged the aliens. There were two hundred of them.

The commander pointed towards the library. “Let's investigate that building.”

“What is the plan of conquest, Commander?” a trooper asked.

“The usual. When it is daylight, we move on to the nearest city which we takeover completely,” the Commander explained as they drew near the library building. “Then we destroy the key power points of the planet and become its rulers. To help us in the ruling and administration of the planet, we recruit local gentry. We are sure to find lots of natives willing to work for us against their own kind.”

The commander then moved forward and touched the wall of the building.

“Made of stone,” he declared. “No plastics.”

“How backward!” responded his men.

“Our conquest will be a blessing for them in disguise.”

“How true!”

Just then, the ectoplasmic body of a man half-emerged through the wall, half out and leaning forward. “Who's making all that ruckus at this time of the night? Can’t a ghost have some peace?”

The Commander gasped. “A g-ghost!” His green face turned greener still.

The ghost had a good view of the backs and heels of the commander and his soldiers as the invasion tube became the retreat tube.

Dawn was approaching.

“Fear of ghosts seems universal,” mused the ghost as he floated back into the library to finish his interrupted dose of the printed word.