and it crashes over you

waves breaking and spraying

the voices swirl around you

talking and laughing and screaming and yelling and crying

you see the empty cups scattered around your room

the plates piling up in the kitchen sink

when’s the last time your bed was made?

the curtains opened?

it drags you under

but pushes you back up

you come to hate breaking the surface

more than you hate being pulled under

losing track of memories

you can’t remember

was it two weeks ago or today?

every time you see someone it’s like a new face

the waves twirl you into a ballerina

spinning in circles

lost in the movements

days are weeks and weeks are months

but minutes are years and seconds are eternities

suddenly it’s now again

you’re standing on the sandbank

struggling, fighting, chasing after your breath

and it crashes over you