Comfort Within Pages

My chest tightens as I struggle to breathe. Words and sounds rush by me in a flurry of motion, but I’m unable make sense of either. The endless litany of noise causes me to feel as if I am being compacted, pushed, and pulled, until all that’s left are a few broken pieces of myself scattered here and there on the solid floor. It takes all of my strength to hold on. I curl up with my knees close to my chest, hugging myself tight. I can feel my heartbeat pounding in my eardrums, and all I want is to be anywhere but here.

Taking a deep breath, I observe my surroundings. Everything is still. My desk and piano lay dormant, awaiting a new surge of creative energy. There’s a wall of bookcases directly ahead. Stained in dark wood, they carefully display organized rows of the stories I’ve collected throughout the years.

A sudden sense of calm rushes over me as I take in the sight. Each novel waves a gentle hello, beaconing me to delve into the comforting escape they offer. All bring me joy, though each contains vastly different worlds and personalities. The characters in these stories are my friends. In the hours we’ve spent together, I’ve come to see them as more real than the strangers I observe outside of my window. We’ve laughed and cried, been anxious and excited, amazed and brave together. The adventures we’ve experienced have shaped how I view and treat the world. They are the foundation upon which I am based.

Now, I know what I need. Reaching carefully toward my faded copy of the particular novel that gives me more joy than anything, I hold it close, cherishing the familiar feeling of anticipation one experiences before embarking on a magical journey. Its corners are worn, some pages torn, and some of the letters are beginning to fade, but it’s just as beautiful as the day I first held it in my hands.

I huddle under the covers, careful not to bend the pages of the book to which I owe my happiness. The lights, save a small lamp I use for this very purpose, grow dim around me, and I’m finally able to breathe. Opening the cover, I embark on my journey into this familiar and fantastical escape, feeling an instant sense of relief as this story reminds me that everything will be alright.