Tragedy of Life

Living life facing the melancholy, but being awed by the beauty.

Bifurcates your heart, your will, your strength and your meaning.

Going through the dark quagmires in life

Leaves stronger and stranger and steals a piece of you for it.

I am at the best time of my life, I am happy, by my definition of it.

But when the clock strikes 12 and the ghosts of the past come knocking,

But when the clocks strikes 1 and the ghosts of the present come knocking,

But when the clocks strikes 2 and the ghosts of the future come knocking,

I am left thwarted wishing the grim reaper would come for my soul

I am left yearning for a sense of freedom from the tragically beautiful life

That I am bound to, till all my heart, my strength and my will, Is syphoned

I live the life as it is given, I do not choose it.

I only choose to make beauty with the time

I find myself unable to stare beauty in its eyes, for fear of losing it, signifiying a lack?

I fear a creeping from the darkness is coming, but then again

I do not fear the tragedies, for they only mean my end draws near

I am torn by the beauty that is living

and the beauty that is freeing my soul from the pain

I am torn for losing the beauty in life means I am closer to the freedom

I am torn for gaining the beauty in life means I am further from the freedom

I am torn for I have the strength to live today and do no wish it

I am torn for I do not know how long my will will sustain me

Or maybe like a vagabond, my life will fade,

Or maybe like a wine, my life will age,

Beautifully, but today this is my quandary.

I am living but would be thankful for death.

So then, in my next life, I wish to be a flower, and think not these thoughts

So then, am I alive or am I broken and does it matter?

For till then I will wander these barren lands seeking beauty, creating beauty,

till the toxicity of these lands I can bear no longer in my golden age

And I will fade hopefully into the nothing never to exist in this form again

So then the tradegy of life is not life itself.

But the strength within these bones that chooses to live it

The fire in my heart that will die only after consuming the beauty we desire

So then the tradegy of life is that I live it and will till....well that doesnt matter.