Hold the Ketchup

"No think you." I said stiffly.

He blinked and set down the red bottle. "Should I have asked for tartar?"

I shook my head. He sighed. I pushed my fries across the plate. He leaned back in his chair refusing to look at his double decker cheeseburger.

"You're food is getting cold." I said. He shrugged. I looked down.

"If you were gay you should have told me. Its been three years," he said softly.

"Its not like I cheated on you." I said. He couldn't meet my gaze.

"I just, three years is a commitment. If you never wanted to be in this relationship you should have told me instead of wasting our time." He said.

The words should have made me angry, but they only made me sad.

"I do want to be in this relationship." I said. "You're my best freind. The best boyfreind I ever had."

"A boyfreind who didn't know you didn't like ketchup." He bit his lip. He ran a knuckle across his eyes. "So I assume you want to break up?"

"I thought about it." I paused. "My parents think I should. They think I should be true to myself and all that."

My boyfreind inhailed. "Well, you should, be yourself, I mean. And if you think we won't work out. It's alright. I won't hold it against you. Maybe we could even hang out sometimes, as freinds."

"Are you freindzoneing me before I've broken up with you?" I asked wryly.

He half smiled. "Just trying to get ahead of the ball."

"In truth, I would miss that icecream shop. You know its expected to avoid the places you hung out with your ex." I said.

He nodded. "That's true. The icecream shop would be forever off limits... and the boardwalk, and the beach, and that one shopping mall you like, and my car. We drove to every prom in that car." He sighed. "I'll miss my car."

I laughted lightly. He went quiet again.

"So why did you kiss me? If you were, you know, not attracted to me."

"I am attracted to you... in some ways." I stuttered.

He held up his hands. "Whoa save the cryptic words for my crazy tarot card obsessed aunt." He was trying to laugh it off. I set my hand on his. The contact wasn't breathtaking. But it wasn't terrible either.

"I want to try and make this work." I said abruptly. "That's what I wanted to say. That's why I called you."

He looked up. "Really? What about.. being true to yourself?"

I laughted. "I feel like myself when I'm with you. So maybe I'm not crazy about kissing. Sometimes I think I'm axsexual or lesbian or pan or something I haven't found yet. But maybe some things are more important than kissing, you know? I like talking to you. And you're right, three years is a long time."

He leaned back in his chair and inhailed. Relief spread across his expression. "I used to have nightmares about you leaving me for some other, nicer, wealthier guy."

"I just remebered I have a date with Bill Gates' son tomorrow. So if that goes well..." I teased.

"Does he even have a son?" He asked.

"No idea." I stood and pulled my purse over my sholder. "I'll get the check."

His eyebrows raised. "No, I got it."

"No, you can pay for icecream next time." I said. "Let me get this."

"Look, if you're doing this becuase you feel bad about comunicating with me-" He started.

"No," I said. "I'm paying becuase I love you."