Catch and Release from a Memory

The palpitations are a warning,

The onset of anxiety forces me deeper into my mind,

He’s coming for me.

*I didn’t do anything wrong! I was saving him from you!

Harboring the fugitive,

Fighting on the wrong side.

*You can’t wait until this happens to me? I didn’t do anything wrong I was just trying to help!

Footsteps echoing on pavement,

The white t-shirt reflects the streetlights beaming with dull yellows above.

*I don’t have to justify anything! I wish it happened sooner!

I cling to myself,

The adrenaline is burning in my veins,

My eyes dart around the corner and your shadow is lurking.

*He’s free and I’ll keep him safe from you until I draw my final breath!

My legs quake and give into the chase, my past bearing down on me like melting skin on a hot iron.

My bare feet burn against the asphalt, painting them blood and black as they slap down harder and harder with each footfall.

*I hear you breathing down my neck, I’m just a mistake and I’ll never amount to anything, but I’ll do better than you!

I run faster and faster until my lungs give out.

You’re right behind me, a shadow attached to my heel.

I can’t keep this up anymore, my tired bones give into the fatigue.

*He’s safe in my pocket, you can look all you want, but you’ll never find-

The thoughts go blank as the blackness strikes, hard against my heart.

I lose my footing and fall down.

Another barrage of attacks.

Assaults splintering wounds all over my arms and legs.

Each scar splayed open, blood screaming out of my skin.

“Fuck You” rips open my leg, each word of you screaming into my memories fade into static, each heartbeat flaying my chest wider open.

I scream until my throat bleeds.

The cold air crystalizes around me, freezing me in place.

The abusing motions stop, my eyes open.

The light from my pocket shatters the ice around me and I smile.

*You’re still safe, at least for a little while.