24

It happened before Tooz, and I had become parents to Bird. I was 27, when Bird came.

The story, it happened while I still lived in the one bedroom apartment , with the windows; that I had named “The House Of Hopes And Dreams”.

I was still , just , a girl then . It was the year I never turned 26, ten years ago.

It was March, my luckiest month every year. It was warm unexpectedly . I ran around that week wearing rainbow knee socks , Devil horns, and Angel wings. I hid in the book store, reading Kahlil Gibran; behind shelves , imagining everyone was looking for me .

Tooz had said ,

“ Keeks! Let’s go to the skate park at 6 pm. I’ll meet you there.”

Or, maybe I had told him ...

I was almost ready to leave , when magnanimous rain clouds rolled into the valley. The windows in my apartment were flung open. I stood in the front room gawking out the large picture window. I stared South , across the Salt Lake City Valley. The wind blew in from the windows of every room . I twirled around , as many times as I needed , through the chilled air. I looked at the clock, it was 5:45

I slipped under the covers of my bed, to feel the cool fresh sheets , for just one minute, before slipping on my shoes to leave . I closed my eyes.

I decided I had better call Tooz. I would probably be late. It was 5:50 . He picked up the call,

“ Hi Keeks!”

I told him I would be late, but not too late .

He told me that I was already late , 24 hours late . I did not believe him , but it was true .

I had slept for exactly 24 hours.

It went by , like the blink of an eye.

I fell back onto my bed, and remembered the dream I had .

. . .

I fell hard , and cold , frozen cold, to the ground running . My lungs burned fiercely , as I began to breathe heavily . It hurt every inch of me , as I began to warm . The heat from my skin hit the dawn air, in a cloud surrounding me. I fell to my knees . I recognized my hands first. The skin was torn , I examined my nail beds . The sight of my own hands moved me into tears. I clawed deep into the earth ; uprooting the grass , to prove I could, and that it would .

I was lying , staring up at the sky. Every part of me was alive. It was a painful awakening. I knew I was not far from my parent’s home , where I grew up. I could locate from the familiar ridge of mountain rock , under the pink sky.

I was in the gully , at the base of the canyon . I stood to cast a sight around at where I was exactly.

The only familiar sight was the curve of the canyon going South . There was no freeway left . The canyon was no longer what it had been , and from 2 miles away I watched as heavy black water viciously tumbled uneven rocky terrain down, down , down, into a deep crack into the earth...

I grew sad, and a memory led me back the way I had come , over to a fenced area . I stood looking down , down , down , into a man built machine inside of the largest part of deep crevice . It was the hydraulic lift system , to the center of the Earth.

I dropped to my knees in horrifying recognition .This was the after . I knew only the plans of before .

A serious face grew on me , from the heaviness of the misunderstood areas in between myself , and this great machine . I noticed a strange sign . I read the map itemized upon it . I thought of God , and I thought of the men who died to keep this machine a secret . I relived conversations from before , when a map of the way into the core was the dream of many men . I relived the many plots drawn , and hidden . The designing of the build of each sector of equipment remained a coveted secret , from all that I could remember .

I remembered him young , and full of genius. I scanned the sign for his name . The name was listed , next to an assigned route on the map. He was 7 layers in, 3 years down into the Earth beneath . I thought of God . My breath was taken , I walked away with a tremble from my own core rising.

I was stunned , but aware of my surroundings from ingrained memory . I headed South, up out of the overgrown gully . The Salt Lake Valley had been destroyed completely North from the gully; wretched water surged in place of the highways . I remembered down to the horizon of the Western mountains. I felt an aching responsibility to remember , and only remember. I was determined not to waste the memory of what once was in displacement along with fear of losing more ground, or fear of ground lost.

My Daughter was where I would travel towards , until I found her. I watched East, out into the remaining homes left on the hill. I believed my parents home was still safe. I knew my Daughter would be with them . I knew nothing of my time since . I only knew to trust that I would find her . Her father was 3 years down inside of the Earth.

I traveled East once I hit the main road , it led past familiar old stone homes . I remembered friends lived all together on the corner , the home still stood . I passed by glad, yet unavailable . I first saw the plans of the network in one of the upstairs rooms , many years ago, under candle light , in that same home.

I knew what had happened. I knew the plans had become the way, and that the way was not overturned . The revolution had succeeded .

I remembered the will , the young pride , the outcast rebel nation. I knew not where I stood then , and I knew not where I stood inside of the new arrival . I felt I had been held inside of a fast moving current , high above the Earth, sleeping for ages . I knew no truth to that picture of existence, but I knew not how to break from it either.

I wandered along , past the old schoolyard. A large, black iron fence had been built around the property. I walked into the yard . I sat on a swing that I had sat on many times since my youth. I remembered being 13 , and doing swing acrobatic tricks ,with my best friend. She was much better at flips , and twirls, than I. I would turn upside down . We would hang , staring down the hill into the Western horizon . We would squint our eyes, and pretend we were staring into the ocean , somewhere in California . That imagery was tragic , as the valley waded steeply into more water than seemed possible of any ocean .

I moved on, from off the swing , and down the road that led back to my parent’s home. Another large fence with a cage had been built against the large property. It rested against the mountain wall. Boulders had been wired in place too. I remembered the property, and the old woman who owned it. I scoured the garden for her garden hat , but she was no where to be found.

All of the homes outgrew my memory . Many fences , and gates , many remodels . Large grand entrances fixed a delusion of the Hollywood style ideals of mansions , white and lit beneath glass paneled fixtures. I grew far away in my dreamlike acceptance of the strange pseudo familiars .

A large dirt field was all that remained of the church, one block away from my child hood home. I heard a nearby waterway , I walked beside it . It was hidden , it ran the width of the entire missing area of four blocks , down what was once the steepest road in the mountain cove , Jupiter Drive. It was all gone , the road , the church, the homes . My heart began racing as my parent’s home came into view. I found steps in place of the street gutter, and a water feature , unfamiliar to me, in the front of the home. It had been painted grey , and the front doors stood two stories tall. My fears that the house had been sold confronted me . I walked the stepping stones up to the door. A large chime set off. No foot steps came . I pressed my dirty hands against the window wall of the door frame. I saw no one .

I sat down and cried . I had fully expected to find my mother . I had so much believed the sound of my daughters voice would be greeting me. I broke, for only a second , because I knew to break would be unrecoverable .

I wandered to the entrance of the small canyon , only twenty minutes walk away. I decided it would still be a Government owned area if it was still standing . I would find a ranger . I would be safe.

I led myself out onto the great trail , I had walked it so many times . I sat to catch the sun on my skin , at a clearing where once a large grand tree stood . Only a hollow stump remained . I sat square upon it. I looked down into it , and the entire universe stared back at me. Stars swirled among purple , and orange dust . The cosmos were much closer than the night sky had ever provided .

I heard my young daughters voice laughing. I cried happy tears , feeling close to her. As I lulled into the illusion many insects began to crawl out of the stump. They were the only friends I knew. I watched the bugs crawl curiously up my legs , my clothes , my arms. Many bugs of every kind . I cried happy tears . I sat allowing myself to be happy, for the first time again. I laughed with my young daughters voice .

A crack, with a boom , pulled me from my mind. I stood up , and ran to the ridge . I overlooked the valley . Fireworks, in the valley, far west . Many planes were circling the flat area directly underneath.

I held a jolt of memory... The last day of the world . A large celebration would be held , if I was looking at it , it meant that I had not arrived . I was late.