The Endless Pursuit

As I blaze a trail through the vast and overgrown forest, I realize that nothing can harm me now. The trees blur as I sprint between them. The leaves and branches that cover the ground barely touch my bare feet. I feel as though I’m flying, my worries left so far back that if I were to look behind myself, they would be mere phantoms in the distance.

But I do not look back. My future lies ahead, and if I were to turn away for just a second, everything I’ve been working towards would come to a crashing halt. Instead of the confident, agile, and quick-thinking being I once was, I would be reduced to a lost soul, struggling to find my bearings in a dark and unforgiving world.

Though you see me as strong and powerful in my stride, I am not as undaunted by difficulties as you may think. Fear is my constant companion. It creeps up on me even now.

At times, I will stumble. An obstacle I haven’t foreseen will break my focus, and I will become that lost version of myself. In those times, I tend to close my eyes and breath, centering my vision and place in this vast universe. Looking up, the full moon will shine down on my face, illuminating the path ahead and reminding me of my eternal purpose.

With the moon’s light to guide me, I will then sprint forward and find my way towards that weightless feeling I so desire with the realization that my life is a never-ending cycle of weightlessness and despair, hope and loss.

I’ve promised myself, like all others before me, to never surrender to the fear that comes in many forms. The fear that clouds my future, that resides in the unknown corners of a world I still haven’t fully explored, always has some place in my heart, but it will not conquer my spirit.

Who I desire to become is a dream that is possible to reach through thoughts and actions, all of which I can control. The greenery that blazes past my sprinting form has its own destiny, as do the leaves and the branches, the rocks and the others that reside in this forest. Our lives will all intertwine and create an unpredictable river of pure life that is both exhilarating and daunting to witness. I cannot control their actions, but it is my choice whether to be pushed by the river or trek my own path along it.

I choose to learn, to grow, to run with wild abandon, the wind flowing across my body with a burst of cool air, speeding me forward. The thing is, I don’t know whether I will reach my desired outcome or if I will become the full and true version of myself I was born to be.

A clearing arrives in front of me, and I stop to admire its beauty. In its center lies a cool, still expanse of water surrounded by many sturdy trees. The stars twinkle above, and the moon is reflected in the surface of that still pond. I stop to take a drink, savoring the refreshing liquid as it cascades down my throat.

No, I may never reach the end of this journey, but that’s not really the point, is it? My effort is what matters, the desire I have in my heart to be good, strong, powerful, purposeful, and helpful. I realize that I am already worthy, that I have been since the moment I was born. And the choices I make to do good and continue this fight are what make me the being I was destined to be.

Taking one last fleeting glance at the smiling light above and the comforting clearing that gave me strength, I move forward once more, sure that after I continue to run and fall and get back up, there will be another comforting rest ahead, and I will journey on once more into the never-ending night with a smile on my face and in my heart.