Moving feet

Therefore, with everything she had on her mind, she went for a run. When she left the house, she instantly felt goosebumps crawling up her neck. It was a cool morning; the fog still billowed between the colorful trees of the forest and the sun dyed the world into a misty, yellowish light.

Her feet started to move by themselves. She felt the damp grass under her shoes, the squishy mud, the moving pebbles. For a moment, she closed her eyes and breathed in the fresh air. It felt refreshing in her lungs, almost revitalizing.

It had been another night without any sleep. There was this big problem at work; the company lost a lot of money. She was sure that it had been her fault, even though she was eager to keep her mouth shut. What would happen if they finally got to the same conclusion as she did? It was definite that she would be fired – but maybe, even worse, everybody would know about it. Her reputation would be so bad, every scientist in her field would talk about her, about how breathtakingly poor her skills were. However at the end, she could probably live with the fact that she failed as a professional - but, most likely, everybody would know about it.

EVERYBODY. Her parents, who had paid her school and university tuition. Her friends, whom she already had been neglecting the last few weeks, or even months. Her former micro technology teacher, who had always said she had a great career ahead of her. Even her cousin, who mentioned at some point that he was a lot smarter and talented than she was.

Her feet felt tired. After all the lack of sleep and all the hours of preoccupation, it was hard for her to focus. Actually, it was hard to do anything. The only thing that kept her body moving was the fact that, afterwards, she would feel better. Slowly, without energy, she ran along the path in the forest. As the trees closed up on her, the new day seemed to turn darker again.

There was also this other problem, not related to work. Only thinking about it made her feel helpless and mad at the same time. She stopped for a moment just to breath in the piercingly cold air and to warily shake her limbs. Actually, it made her feel nervous. He made her feel nervous.

She forced her feet to move again, even though it cost her a lot of effort. In the woods, the fog grew more dense, and it was impossible to see further than 10 or 15 meters. The air was almost surreally calm, the leaves felt down the trees without dancing in the wind. She was running in a gentle rain of colorful leaves.

Her ex-boyfriend was – kind of – stalking her. He called her several times a day, left her messages, send her letters. One night he even knocked on her door and would not go away for 15 minutes. Insisting on talking to her, he would not leave her alone. This behavior was not only annoying, but it also made her feel permanently observed.

Her phone peeped twice, and her heart started beating twice as fast. She slowed down her pace and finally came to a halt. With anticipation, she pulled out her phone from the pocket of her jacket. Was it her ex-boyfriend reaching out to her once again? She realized that her hands were almost frozen; it was difficult to tap on the screen, to move her fingers.

Need you in the office asap. Andrea had an idea.

Abruptly, she stopped breathing. Did they find out about her mistake? For an instant, she felt the world spinning. Her phone felt out of her hand, landing on the frozen floor. A searing pain plastered her chest. Gulping, she reached for air. She could not control her breathing; it was too fast, far too fast. Was she going to die? Of a heart attack? Of the sheer fact she forgot how to breathe?

Her feet gave in and she felt on the cold floor. She rolled up like a fetus and the trees seemed to move in on her. As she laid there, she was sure she was going to die. But after a while, her breathing normalized. The pain went away. She felt how the cold slowly crawled into her body. So, at last, she stood up.

What am I going to do? she thought, helplessly. I have to go on, go home. Face the music at work. That was a plan she knew how to follow. And her feet started to move by themselves again.

As soon as possible.

Her feet started to move even faster. Maybe it would be the best to just confess everything - she could just enter the lab and tell them what had happened, that it had been her fault all along; she would feel so peaceful. She would not have to worry about it anymore, she could just go to bed and actually sleep. Probably her mom was still going to love her afterwards.

Andrea had an idea.

A noise behind her. Abruptly, she turned around, stopped breathing. Her fingertips tingled in the cold, her ears ringed alarmingly. She tried to look through the wall of fog behind her. But she could not see anybody – there was nobody. Okay, just an animal. Go home.

Her feet started to move again. But still, she had the unmistakable feeling that somebody was behind her. The forest seemed to grow darker, more dense.

Just go home. As soon as possible.

And then, the truth hit her. Surely, it was her ex-boyfriend chasing after her. Anger spread through her body, her hands clenched into fists. What is he thinking? He was going too far. She remembered that once, after a big fight, he waited for her outside her house, hidden behind a pillar, so she would not see him from far away. Back then, she found it charming; now she considered it creepy. What should I do? She listened closely to her surrounding – birds chirping, wood croaking under the mild breeze. No footsteps; but still, she turned around.

Once again, she saw nobody – but this time, she was sure that there was somebody. Her ex-boyfriend. “Juan”, she screamed into the fog, her voice was shaking, “please, come on. I don’t want you following me like this.” No response. Only the bird’s chirping seemed to get more intense.

She saw a shadow in the dark wood, it moved. It moved towards her, got slowly closer. It surely did not move like Juan. And if it isn’t him? Instantly, her heart began to bound fast and loud. The cold of the air changed into the hotness of a summers’ sun beating down without mercy. Her body was like frozen to the floor, she could not move a muscle. The birds felt silent.

Suddenly, her feet began to move, like they were thinking on their own; they moved faster and faster, like a gazelle trying to escape their predator. She was not able to think, her whole body just screamed that she was frightened – frightened to death. Terrified, she was trying to listen for footsteps. But she could not; she just could not hear anything. Only the blood rushing through her body. Her only way to escape was to get off the path into the dense, misty forest. There the stranger would not see her anymore, would not be able to follow her steps.

As soon as possible.

Putting all her courage together, she jumped off the path. The trees swallowed her instantly, the fog embraced her immediately. Her mind was blank, her feet kept moving.

After a little while, she slowed down. Her whole body was hurting, but she listened closely to her surroundings. When she could not hear anything, she turned her head around, still running at slow pace. Maybe the person behind me wasn’t actually chasing me? Suddenly, it seemed like a root wrapped itself around her ankle. She felt. And landed on the meadow – and on the hard rocks. It hurt. Struggling, she pushed herself onto her back, finally looking up into the misty sky.

Lying on the cold, damp ground, she knew she had to get up again. But she did not know how.