I love you, but

the peace

in your absence

is undeniable

the language

of your desire

for reconciliation

has never changed

how can I believe

we can be different

if you have nothing

new to say

I know you miss me

the feeling of my body

next to yours

if I were only a body

our relationship

would be so easy

but I'm so much more than that

I thought you could see

but I'm no longer sure

you've never said

you miss our conversations

or the poems I wrote about you

about us

you've never acted

on your stated willingness

to go to counseling

or otherwise make positive changes

between us

I have been alone

a long, long time

even while in relationships

I thought

we had something different

in the end

it's more of the same

it's me to blame

while the fire

of your desire

stays lit

so when you are lit

you come by for a hit

and you know

I love you, but

this has to end.