Show Me What Normal Is So I Can Fake It

Give me a guide to follow

Something standered and common

The thing everybody was born with.

Except for me.

The thing I'm missing is tangible

I know what it should feel like

to be able to not feel like puking all the time.

I know it's normal to not cry all the time,

To be able to sleep through the night,

And only sweat when with fever,

And to only shake when cold.

I know that I'm supposed to

Be able to calm down.

Instead I'm always on the edge waiting

For a thoughtless gesture or word

To blow me over

Crash on the the rocks below

And lie still.