Despair

There are no words to describe the feelings you get when you look into a mothers eyes, and you know that you killed her son; regardless of what he'd done.

There's really no way to convey the thoughts that keep you awake at night, your mind a mess, splattered on the wall like blood spraying from a throat.

There's no reasonable way to ask the police to stop trying to console you. That young cop has never hurt anyone, much less been drenched in someones blood and watched the light die from his eyes.

There's no way you can bring her back, or make him apologize for killing her.

It's permanent.

There's nothing that can be undone.

You're a bright young kid.

You're two months from graduating college.

You have a career planned.

You have a date this Saturday.

You fucked up.

You feel like you need to throw up.

You could have knocked him out.

You know she hates you.

You could have knocked him out.

You've lost everything.

You could have knocked him out.

You lost control. Again.

he didnt't have to die

You could have knocked him out.

You feel empty, numb.

maybe YOU should

You know you're sorry.

You know that doesn't mean shit.

YOU CRAVE DEATH

You think it will get better one day.

YOU STILL HAVE THE KNIFE

You're not sure.

You'd hoped you could see your mother in heaven one day.

DO IT

But after tonight, you know that can't happen.

Instead, tomorrow, you'll be meeting your step-father in Hell.