Loss of will.

For me it was to escape my pain and emptiness. I didn't care at the time if I was being selfish, I just didn't want to feel anymore.

I was tired of being hurt, being manipulated, and treated like an outcast.

It took years of therapy for me to understand that the way I viewed my suicidal thoughts was that suicide would be an easy way out of my life instead of facing my problems and fears head on.

But even though I realize this, I still think of suicide ever so often.

Life is tough, it's a constant battle that you're always fighting. If I give into suicide, that just means I lost my will to fight for my right to live.