Lost and Found

And I can’t help but wonder where it is that I went wrong. I learned long ago that it is dangerous to let your mind travel the journey back to the past. Still, I think it’s a part of human nature. I think it’s unavoidable that we use the past to try and understand ourselves. The how’s and why’s of why we are the way we are. We go digging up our memories like bones that were buried in the back yard years ago. We try and dust them off, and then use them to connect the dots. To assemble the puzzle that looks so confusing until we find the missing pieces, and put it all together. But for some of us, there are pieces that cannot be retrieved. There are things that we did, or that we endured that cannot be remembered. And perhaps that is our own unconscious form of self preservation. Perhaps some things are better lost then they are found. And rather then digging up all of those things that were laid to rest, we must learn to accept it. We must learn to let go of the things we cannot get back to, and of the things that we cannot get back. Maybe then the past won’t have such a say in who we are. Maybe we will be able to define ourselves only with who we are right now. Right here. In this present moment. Maybe, just maybe... we will even be set free.