I Wouldn’t, I Would...

In another world I would be smaller, I wouldn’t have 155 pounds of muscle fit for an athletic boy but not a pretty little lady.

I wouldn’t have cystic acne, dots and humps thriving on my face until evicted with a small needle and some witch hazel, only to return days later.

I wouldn’t have so many mental blocks that I can’t reach my real potential in the sport I love.

I wouldn’t be mixed, I would be a cute petite white girl with blonder hair, blue eyes, and no bulging muscles insight. I would get the boys with a cute wink of my long lashes and a little smile.

I wouldn’t have a ghoulishly morbid sense of humor and an obsession with serial killers and mummies.

I wouldn’t feel the need to establish dominance over everyone who challenges me.

I wouldn’t be clumsy and awkward in my big shouldered form.

I would be supermodel tall or baby doll small. I wouldn’t be 5′4″ with the legs and shoulders of someone at least a lovely 5′11″.

In my perfect world, which sadly isn’t this one, I wouldn't have been bullied for these things.

I would think a little extra is just that, extra.

I wouldn’t be jealous of my best friends all the time with their long thin forms and smooth faces.

I would think myself beautiful.

I would think that my long legs and curly hair seductive and exotic.

I would admire my freckly face and large chocolate brown eyes.

I would flex in the mirror every morning and smile at myself as I leave, cause I look good.

I wouldn’t let those who challenge me get under my skin.

My sense of humor would be the amazing anchor point of my intriguing and complex personality.

But sadly, I don’t live in that world.