Depression

You see the smile I bear across my face

You neglect to see the pain

Because it's hidden

In it's own space

I try to explain

Words simply do not do

I feel ashamed

So I try to pretend for you

You acknowledge my feelings

But do not understand the extent

You expect it to pass

Becoming a historic event

You think it's a phase

One I will simply outgrow

You neglect to see I am broken

So to you, I am putting on a show

You remind me of our blessings

I know these to be true

It saddens me to feel the weight

Of how this also affects you

I am the culprit

This is the greatest of wars

I know I am to blame

For these, the muddiest of shores

I want to find it

The joy I once possessed

Just the energy of the thought, though

Compels me to rest

It is not just a darkness

It is a lack there of

No energy

No hope

And sadly, little room for love

My passions are gone

My personality depleted

My old spirit

Left in its grave, defeated

I want you to understand

But I fear this even more

That sympathizing with me

Will also leave you at the devils door

Instead, I will hide

Under lock and key

I will unlock the door and leave

Only when I know I am ready

For now I will stay

I think I need to feel

Until my strength

Is eventually revealed

This is a lesson

One I wish to not repeat

I must first sit and embrass my depression

Before I can stand on my own two feet