My Worst Insecurities

My worst insecurity? That's a hard one. Probably close to just about everything about me. I've always struggled with negative opinions of my physical appearance, but recently, I have also been worrying more about how others view my personality. For the purpose of not wasting everyone who is reading this' time, I will only talk about my most recent fears about how I act.

Being nice used to be the only reason that someone would ever want to be around me. I always try to be as nice as I can, because I know how much it sucks when someone random comes up to you and is a total jerk. People have even told me to be more mean before. That being said, this next part has been very confusing for me. A month or two ago, two girls in my grade have been going around behind my back and calling me mean. That is honestly one of the worst things that someone can say about me, because I know I'm not pretty, I know I'm not rich, and I know I'm not smart, but I try as hard as I can to be a good person and a good friend, and with one word someone can take all of that away.

The funny thing is that both of the two main people who have been saying those things have no reason to. The first one doesn't even know me. Sure, she might know my name from a friend, but we have never had a single conversation. Not one. The other one has had problems with me for a couple of years. Last year, we were friends, but that ended the moment that she decided that it would be fun to cyberbully me. I never did anything besides tell the counselor, not even while in the friendship, so she wouldn't have any reason to call me mean. If anyone was a bad person, it would be her. That just about sums up what my biggest insecurity is at the moment, but just keep in mind that if I had the time, I could have written a novel about my remaining insecurities.