The Eighth Circle of Hell

“This has gotta be a mistake, I can’t be dead. I didn’t even finish college!” Yet another complaining child in the sea of those damned to hell. How original. 

“Listen kid, it’s not a mistake. You think we want more people down here? Luci’s getting tired of building new land for the newbies. Go talk to God if you wanna get out of here.”

The demon staring down at him looked intimidating, but his voice seemed bored. He flipped through some pages before clearing his throat. 

“Uh, Ray, right?” Hearing his name... that made this whole thing feel that much more real. All he could do was nod in response, waiting for his punishment. “Alright, well, for your sins of being obnoxious to everyone you meet, you’re designated to go to the eighth circle of hell. Have fun,” the large demon grumbled, snapping his fingers. 

“What, that’s not a-“ before Ray could finish, he felt the floor beneath him disappear, and he watched the bright red of hell merge into nothing but darkness.

It felt like he had been falling for an eternity. When surrounded by silence, left with nothing but his thoughts, time stood still. 

Until he felt his feet touch the ground again. 

“New guy! Hey, welcome to the eighth circle of hell. I’m Calvin, I’ll be your tour guide for today. And for the rest of your afterlife, hah! Pretty great right?” Another demon, shorter than the one he had first met, cold blue eyes and black horns, flowing red robe... this all had to be a dream. 

“Well now, don’t be shy!” Calvin pat him roughly on the back and pushed him forwards to get him to walk. It was only now that Ray took in the scenery. There was only a thin walkway that led over the deep ditch in the ground, which spanned as far as he could see. Looking down over the edge he saw... what? 

“Yeah, right now ol’ Satan’s got us training for the big party coming at the end of the year,” Calvin muttered somewhat annoyedly, waving his hand towards the party happening at the bottom of the hole. “Usually we’ve got a bar and games set up, but you know how it is. His party has to be perfect! Anyways.” With the demon’s hand on his back, he felt a pressure as he was punted down towards the group of people dancing, who simply moved out of the way to let Ray face plant into the glowing dance floor. 

Suddenly, he could hear the music blasting through his ears, and someone leans down to help him up. “Welcome to the party!”

Huh. Maybe being dead wasn’t as bad as he thought it would be.