Beautiful and Nasty Things

Appeasing my parents, or trying to, is a total compulsion. Afterward, I often think, “why did I say that,” or “why did I offer to do that.” My brother simply doesn’t respond. He keeps to himself for the same reasons I try to be someone else. Different defense mechanisms, equal causation. A deception of our deepest selves is what we learned and became masters of. The distance is just safer.