I'll declare the winner based on word count. [Note Well: Punctuation counts! I will disqualify run-ons. If you'd like to know whether I consider your work properly-punctuated, tag me in the comments with that request.] [EDIT: Though I've received many creative entries, this challenge is meant to be taken in a literal sense!! Give me a beast of a sentence that goes on for as long as you can draw it out.]