Toxic M&M’s

They keep leaving toxic hors d'oeuvres behind, much to my chagrin, a culinary delight according to my poodle. The mock M&M's keep making him ill but unlike humans, trying to teach a down and dirty dog cause and effect is one big fat exercise in futility.

As if the stomach distress of my dog wasn't bad enough, the little fuckers eat just about everything in my garden, including the barberry, a bush that sports needle like thorny thorns. Jiminy crickets! Do they possess teflon tongues?

I'm inside looking out my slider at the bushes right now and they are as bald as George Castanza, damn it. But, holla at your boy, gotta give it up when they hop off from here to their next victim. Don't they just look too damn cute protruding that sweet little cottontail.