As the Sun Disappears so will I

The sun’s golden rays lay on me like a blanket that I wish I had. It’s been cold recently, making everything feel like it’s icing over including my mind. Although today is a beautiful day to be my last. The skies streaked with orange and pink and purple, so many colors. More than I feel like I’ve seen in a long time. If only they were enough to keep me here. The embaressment, the humiliation, the hunger, the cold, they’re what’s causing this. They will be my murderers, the things that take my life. All the people that looked down on me as if I was lesser because of my situtation will never have to see me again and I will never have to see their looks of pity. They’re glued into my mind, like haunting ghosts I can never get rid of. I no longer can persevere through this. I’m over trying to make the best of this life. As the sun sets over the high mountains I will disapear into the raging river below. This seems a fitting way for me to end. I’ll die by the thing I love most: water.

Cars zoom by like busy bees rushing to pollinate. The bridge isn’t very high up but it will do. I can hear the water below rage as if it’s been angered. I feel a connection to such a thought. It’s easy to be upset but it’s not so easy to get over the feeling. Just as it’s easy for still water to ripple but not so easy for it to remain still. I’ll close my eyes this one last time and drink in the beauty that I once thought this world had. And as I exhale I’ll feel any regrets that I might of had being wisped away by the slight breeze. I open my eyes to a slightly darker sky, this will be the last sunset that I see.

It doesn’t take long for the sky to become a deep blue. A few lights have dotted the sky, which is rare for a city to see. I step onto the ledge and look down below at the water once more. To some this might be sad or tragic but to me this is true freedom. I’ll be free from humiliation and judgement. And with those thoughts I jump. I feel the cold sensation of water and then nothing. Nothing at all. I am finally free.